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The Editing Blog: for Editors, Proofreaders and Writers

FOR EDITORS, PROOFREADERS AND WRITERS

Foreshadowing in crime fiction and thrillers: How to plant clues and keep the story tense

30/6/2026

2 Comments

 
Learn how to use foreshadowing in crime fiction and thrillers to build suspense, plant clues and keep readers guessing without giving too much away.
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In this post

  • What foreshadowing is
  • Is foreshadowing always about unease?
  • What effective foreshadowing achieves
  • Foreshadowing and shared uncertainty
  • How foreshadowing drives suspense
  • 4 examples of effective and poor foreshadowing
  • Tips for controlling foreshadowing

What foreshadowing is

Foreshadowing is the controlled planting of information that only becomes fully meaningful later in a story. Think of it as a warning or sign – one that might be subtle or more explicit.
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Rather than announcing what will happen, writers place carefully chosen details into the narrative so that, in hindsight, the outcome feels both surprising but logical.

In crime fiction and thrillers, that’s especially important because the reader is actively encouraged to try to unravel the mystery rather than just follow it. Foreshadowing can be part of that problem-solving process.

Is foreshadowing always about unease?

People sometimes assume that foreshadowing is about uneasy or ominous vibes, especially in crime fiction and thrillers. That association probably comes from how frequently the technique is used in those genres, rather than from what foreshadowing actually is.

In fact, foreshadowing is a neutral mechanism – one through which emotion is born. In other words, the emotion is the consequence.

Foreshadowing details can certainly create a sense of unease, but they could equally produce other emotions. Which ones will depend on your story. Possibilities could include:
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  • unease or dread if the detail hints at danger or harm
  • curiosity if it suggests a mystery without immediate threat
  • doubt if it suggests that the information might not be trustworthy 
  • anticipation if it signals an upcoming payoff or reveal
  • joy if it nudges the reader in the direction of a happy event.
  • recognition (in hindsight) when the reader realises a clue was present all along, but initially missed its significance.

What effective foreshadowing achieves

Done effectively, foreshadowing:
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  • preserves narrative viewpoint
  • creates anticipation but preserves uncertainty
  • rewards readers who pay attention but doesn’t give away answers
  • makes revelations feel justified rather than random.

Foreshadowing and shared uncertainty

Foreshadowing works best when the reader and viewpoint character have the same limited knowledge and shared uncertainty. In this situation:

  • the reader only knows what the viewpoint character knows
  • both interpret clues at the same time
  • both are equally vulnerable to misunderstanding
  • both revise their understanding together as new information emerges.

Foreshadowing inside a state of shared uncertainty is especially powerful because it feels like the fictional world is gradually revealing itself to both of you at once, rather than the author speaking to the reader.
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And that’s the key thing. When you introduce foreshadowing to your writing, you don’t want it to seem like some external narrator is tapping your reader on the shoulder and shouting hints into their ear. Instead, suggestion is embedded into the character’s experience.

How foreshadowing drives suspense

Suspense is the sustained feeling of uncertainty and anticipation that arises when a reader knows something important is at stake but doesn’t yet know how, when or whether it will be resolved.

Foreshadowing can help build suspense by separating information from understanding.

For example, a character (and therefore the reader) could:
  • see a clue (information)
  • and then either register its significance correctly or incorrectly, or fail to notice its relevance (understanding).  

Suspense emerges from the gap between what’s seen and what’s understood. Instead, the reader will ask: What does this mean? Why was this detail included? Is this important or misleading?

​When done well, foreshadowing keeps those questions active but doesn’t answer them too early.

4 examples of effective and poor foreshadowing

​Here are four examples of when foreshadowing works … and when it doesn’t, each one with a short analysis of what’s going on.
Example 1: Viewpoint focus
This example includes details that foreshadow the possibility of data manipulation and internal misconduct.
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Effective foreshadowing
     Inspector Harris studied the crime scene photos again.
     Something about the composition bothered her. The angle of the shot felt slightly off – too deliberate, as if the image had been framed rather than simply taken.
     She set the photograph down and checked the evidence log. It had been filed by Lane two weeks earlier. Nothing unusual there; Lane had handled most of the documentation on the case. Still, no harm in pulling the actual file.
     She went to the evidence room and checked the chain-of-custody sheet. It was clean – maybe a little too clean. Every entry signed, every timestamp aligned. In all honesty, nothing here was wrong.
     And that was exactly what unsettled her.
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Poor foreshadowing
     Inspector Harris studied the crime scene photos again.
     Something about the composition bothered her. The angle of the shot felt slightly off – too deliberate, as if the image had been framed rather than simply taken.
     What Harris didn’t realize was that the torn photograph she was holding had been deliberately planted by Detective Lane two weeks earlier. Lane had already altered the evidence chain, replaced the original report and ensured every witness statement pointed away from him.
     Harris turned the photo over.
     If she had been paying closer attention, she would have noticed the ink was still fresh. But she didn’t. Not yet.
Comparing the two
Notice how in the first version, the reader and the detective are investigating together. We’re inside her head and know only what she knows and feels, and what she can objectively observe. This preserves the close, restricted viewpoint, and builds a sense of uncertainty that can be explored in more detail as the investigation progresses.

In the second version, however, we have a god’s-eye view. The narrative’s no longer bound by what Harris can perceive, infer or reasonably suspect. Instead, readers now have access to information that they haven’t earned the right to know because Harris hasn’t discovered it – ie Lane’s manipulation two weeks earlier.

Viewpoint integrity has collapsed, and a plot point has been given away so that there’s no longer any anticipation. Any questions the reader had have been answered.

Craft takeaway
Foreshadowing works by embedding clues within the character’s experience. If you step outside that experience to explain those clues, you’re no longer foreshadowing. You’re simply giving the game away.
Example 2: Evidence assessment
This example includes details that foreshadow potential issues with the evidence’s provenance and integrity.
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Effective foreshadowing
     ‘Inspector Harris – thank God.’
     Martin Cole bent forward, hands on his knees, and took ragged breaths. ‘I found something. It changes everything. It’s … look. Best if I show you.’ He straightened and began scrolling through his phone, thumb moving quickly across the screen. ‘This proves who was at the warehouse.’
     Harris’s radio crackled. Unit response required at Dock Road. Possible escalation. All available officers. She glanced at Cole.
     ‘I just need five minutes,’ he said, and turned the screen toward her.
     A short video clip began to load. Harris leaned in.
     On the screen: grainy footage from a street camera – timestamped, apparently placing a vehicle near the warehouse at the time of the fire.
     ‘Where did you get this?’
     ‘It was in a shared folder,’ Cole said. ‘I didn’t change anything.’
     The radio crackled again. Urgent response required. Dock Road incident escalating.
     Harris held up a hand. Told Cole to wait, then tapped her earpiece. ‘Acknowledged. Stand by.’ Then to Cole:  ‘AirDrop it. I’ll order an integrity verification and source tracing.’
Cole’s eyes were like saucers. ‘Is it real?’
     'I don’t know yet,’ Harris said. ‘That’s what we need to find out.’
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Poor foreshadowing
     ‘Inspector Harris – thank God.’
     Martin Cole bent forward, hands on his knees, and took ragged breaths. ‘I found something. It changes everything. It’s … look. Best if I show you.’ He straightened and began scrolling through his phone, thumb moving quickly across the screen. ‘This proves who was at the warehouse.’
     Harris’s radio crackled – Unit response required at Dock Road. Possible escalation. All available officers. She glanced at it, then back at Cole.
     ‘Make it quick.’
     Cole turned the screen toward her. A short video clip played: grainy footage from a street camera, timestamped, showing a vehicle near the warehouse at the time of the fire.
     Harris frowned. ‘Where did you get this?’
     ‘Shared folder,’ Cole said. ‘I didn’t change anything. But it’s clear, isn’t it? That’s the car.’
     Harris nodded and patted his shoulder. ‘Looks like it.’
     The radio crackled again. ‘I have to go,’ she said. ‘Send it to me.’ She was already moving. ‘We’ll pick it up later.’
Comparing the two
In the first version, there’s a cluster of small signals that foreshadow problems with the evidence:

  • contamination or manipulation (the footage comes from a shared folder)
  • uncertain provenance (Cole states, unprompted, that he didn’t change it)
  • the need for verification (Harris orders integrity checks and source tracing).

Taken together, these don’t point directly at the truth, but at the uncertainty of what might be the truth. The radio callout is handled credibly so that it intensifies urgency without blocking access to the information.

Crucially, the evidence is captured but not yet understood. That keeps the reader in suspense, asking not what the footage shows, but whether it can be trusted, who placed it there, and how it might need to be reinterpreted.

In the second version, two of those same signals are still present but they’re not acted on.
The shared source and uncertain provenance both suggest that the footage may be unreliable, yet the investigator treats it as effectively definitive. The doubt is raised, then immediately flattened.

This is where the foreshadowing breaks down. The story introduces uncertainty but fails to follow through on its implications, so the detail stops functioning as foreshadowing and becomes clutter.

Craft takeaway
Foreshadowing isn’t just about planting clues but also about honouring what those clues imply. If you introduce doubt, follow through on it. Otherwise, it isn’t foreshadowing; it’s just noise.
Example 3: Emotional history
This example includes details that foreshadow unresolved trauma or past wrongdoing.
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Effective foreshadowing
     Emily gestured for me to sit in the armchair. Not that there was another option. My new neighbour’s living room was a tip, most of the surfaces littered with piles of paper, ancient-looking books, dog hair and dust. She shunted a stack of magazines to the edge of the sofa and lowered herself onto the cushion.
     For ten minutes or so we chatted – inconsequential stuff about the weather, the bus service, the potholes in the road. She made weak tea and served it with a plate of digestives that had lost their bite.
     I was wondering how best to take my leave without offending her when she blurted, ‘So you moved in on Thursday, did you? Is it just you?’
     ‘At the moment,’ I replied.
     ‘Good for you. I wish I’d had that privilege when I was your age. But things were different back then. You had to put up and shut up, or ... get creative.’
     Those final two words came out as if they’d left a bad taste in her mouth, and for a moment it was like she was looking past me rather than at me. Then it passed, and she laughed, though the sound was brittle rather than soothing.
     I was about to ask if she was okay, but she stood abruptly, clapped her hands and smiled. ‘Well, it was lovely to meet you,’ she said. ‘Do come again.’
     I probably wouldn’t, I decided.
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Poor foreshadowing
     Emily gestured for me to sit in the armchair. Not that there was another option. My new neighbour’s living room was a tip, most of the surfaces littered with piles of paper, ancient-looking books, dog hair and dust. She shunted a stack of magazines to the edge of the sofa and lowered herself onto the cushion.
     For ten minutes or so we chatted – inconsequential stuff about the weather, the bus service, the potholes in the road. She made weak tea and served it with a plate of digestives that had lost their bite.
     I was wondering how best to take my leave without offending her when she blurted, ‘So you moved in on Thursday, did you? Is it just you?’
     ‘At the moment,’ I replied.
     ‘Good for you. I wish I’d had that privilege when I was your age. But things were different back then. You had to put up and shut up, or ... get creative. I was in a very bad situation with a man who controlled everything I did. I-I had no choice but ... but to kill him ... That’s what I mean by getting creative.’
     Then she stood quickly, clapped her hands and smiled. ‘Well, it was lovely to meet you,’ she said. ‘Do come again.’
     Feeling disturbed, I decided I probably wouldn’t.
Comparing the two
In the first version, there are foreshadowing details that create uncertainty around what Emily means when she references her past. These are:

  • her ambiguous phrasing (‘get creative’)
  • her visible discomfort
  • the brief period of disassociation followed by a too-fast restoration of socially conventional behaviour.

That combination creates tension because nothing is explained, but the signs are that there’s more to the conversation than meets the eye.

The second version just spits it out. There’s nothing left to infer, suspect or anticipate. By answering questions too early, rather than encouraging the reader to form those questions through the foreshadowing signals, the tension and suspense plummet.

Craft takeaway
Effective foreshadowing provides cues without confirming what they mean. The moment a cue is fully explained, it stops functioning as foreshadowing and becomes exposition.
Example 4: Ominous event
This example includes details that foreshadow the later significance and threat associated with the envelope.
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Effective foreshadowing
     I almost missed the envelope because it had slipped halfway under the door, just enough to look like part of the shadow. The hallway light above me flickered – not unusual, just old wiring – but the paper seemed to shift slightly, like it was breathing.
     I remember thinking it was odd that there was no stamp. No address, either. Just my name, written carefully, like whoever had done it didn’t want to get it wrong.
     For a moment, I left it there and listened. The building was quiet in that late-afternoon way, when most people are still at work and the ones who aren’t don’t want to be noticed. Somewhere upstairs, a door closed a little too hard, and I flinched.
     Then I picked up the envelope and turned it over in my hands. It was heavier than I expected.
     That’s the part I keep coming back to – the weight of it. Not enough to mean anything on its own. But enough that I noticed.
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Poor foreshadowing
     I almost missed the envelope because it had slipped halfway under the door. Looking back, it was an important moment that would later lead to a series of terrible events that I could have prevented if I had just paid more attention. The hallway light above me flickered ominously, as if warning me that something bad was going to happen, even though at the time I didn’t realize it.
     ​I immediately felt uneasy, like something was wrong. In hindsight, that feeling was completely justified because the envelope contained something that would change my life forever, and in a very negative way. I did notice that there was no stamp or address, which should have been another obvious red flag, but unfortunately I ignored it.
     For a moment, I left it there and listened carefully, already feeling a sense of dread building inside me. The building was unnaturally quiet, almost as if everyone knew what was about to happen except me. Somewhere upstairs, a door slammed loudly, making me jump, which further emphasized how tense the situation was becoming.
     ​When I finally picked up the envelope, I could tell right away that it was heavier than normal. I didn’t think much more about it, though I wish I had because I now know it was a clear indication of how perilous the contents would turn out to be.
Comparing the two
The foreshadowing in these versions is more explicit than in Examples 1–3, yet only one is effective. The difference comes down to trust: one shows, while the other tells.

The first version trusts the reader to notice patterns – the flicker, the silence and the weight of the envelope – and draw their own conclusions. It builds unease through specific sensory details while still leaving space for uncertainty and interpretation.

Contrast this with the second version, which doesn’t trust the reader at all. It repeatedly interrupts itself to explain what everything means and why it matters, draining the tension and making the voice feel performative.

Craft takeaway
When you’re tempted to explain why a detail matters, cut the explanation and strengthen the detail instead. A concrete image (like the unexpected weight of the envelope) will carry far more tension than a sentence telling the reader it’s important.

Tips for controlling foreshadowing

Here are some practical tips to help you control your foreshadowing:

Plant early and pay off later
Introduce details long before they become important, rather than in the moment of revelation. That way no one will be able to accuse you of unearned writing – whereby the outcomes, emotions or revelations aren’t justified by what’s come before, making them feel unconvincing to the reader.

Look ordinary at first mention
Effective foreshadowing detail looks like ordinary but interesting detail at first mention, but gains further meaning later.

Vary the level of clarity
Some of your foreshadowing details can be obvious in hindsight, giving your reader an of-course moment. Others might be almost invisible until they’re re-examined. By varying the level of clarity, you avoid setting up patterns that the reader might spot.

Ensure retrospective meaning
Effective foreshadowed detail has a purpose and always earns its place later. If you put something in but it never becomes relevant, there’s a risk that you’ve unnecessarily cluttered your prose.

Track reader knowledge
Make sure you track what clues the reader has actually been shown and can reasonably remember, so that they can recognize them and accept the logic in play.

Avoid signalling too loudly
If the reader can guess the outcome too early because your foreshadowing signals are noisy, you’ll turn an opportunity for suspense into confirmation. The key with good foreshadowing is to ensure it’s both subtle and relevant.

Summing up

Foreshadowing is not about hiding information or predicting outcomes in advance, but about shaping how readers interpret information over time.

The most effective foreshadowing often feels like ordinary detail in the moment, and then becomes meaningful in hindsight. But even more explicit foreshadowing that hints at a future dramatic event needs to hold back so that there’s space for the reader’s curiosity and anticipation.
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Do your best not to overexplain too early. That way you’ll preserve the tension and suspense.

About Louise Harnby

Louise Harnby is a line editor, copyeditor and proofreader who specializes in working with crime, mystery, suspense and thriller writers.

She is an Advanced Professional Member of the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CIEP) and co-hosts The Editing Podcast.

  • Get in touch: Louise Harnby | Crime Fiction & Thriller Editor
  • Connect: X @LouiseHarnby, Facebook and LinkedIn
  • Learn: Books and courses
  • Discover: Resources for authors and editors

2 Comments

Red herrings in crime fiction and thrillers: Designing false conclusions

9/6/2026

1 Comment

 
Learn how to use red herrings to create believable false conclusions, deepen mystery structure, and keep readers confidently wrong at just the right moments.
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In this post ...

  • What is a red herring?
  • What’s the difference between a red herring and controlled misdirection?
  • Writing red herrings: The golden rules
  • What a red herring is not: Common misconceptions (with examples)

What is a red herring?

A red herring is a storytelling device that introduces information that appears to support a plausible explanation, but ultimately leads to the wrong conclusion.
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Bear in mind that red herrings are not always limited to characters or their motives. Some writers construct them around how an entire fictional world works.

What’s the difference between a red herring and controlled misdirection?

I like to separate red herrings from the idea of controlled misdirection because a red herring feels heavier.

While it does involve misdirection, it works by building a false but plausible explanatory path that steers the reader towards an incorrect conclusion, only to collapse later under the weight of the real solution. This not only delays the reader’s understanding, but also forces them to construct a competing narrative that appears to solve the mystery … until it doesn’t.
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Sometimes writers like to introduce other points of misdirection that are less weighty. These focus not on shaping the conclusion, but how information is interpreted in the moment. These are what I call ‘controlled misdirection’.

>> Find out more about controlled misdirection here.

Key distinction
At their core, the difference is this:

Controlled misdirection shapes how the reader interprets information, while red herrings construct a complete but ultimately false explanation.

In practice, both can appear alongside each other in crime fiction. They’re just operating slightly differently.

Writing red herrings: The golden rules

All effective red herrings should be:
  • believable: The false lead must feel like a genuinely viable explanation. It should align with genre expectations and established patterns of behaviour or evidence.
  • relevant-seeming: A red herring should feel connected to the central mystery. If it feels random or unrelated, readers will dismiss it rather than engage with it.
  • supported by surface evidence: There must be enough apparent justification to make the conclusion feel earned at the time. Coincidence alone won’t be convincing.
  • coherent as a theory: The red herring should form a complete, internally consistent explanation, even if it’s ultimately wrong.
  • integrated into the story’s logic: It should arise naturally from the world of the story rather than feel artificially inserted for the purpose of misleading the reader.
  • timely: Introduce it early enough that it can function as a competing explanation, not as a late, shoehorned-in distraction from the real solution.
  • emotionally plausible: Red herrings often work well when they tap into familiar motives like jealousy, greed, revenge, panic and so on.
  • resolvable: Every red herring must eventually be dismantled or explained so that the reader understands exactly why it was misleading.​

What a red herring is not: Common misconceptions

Here’s what a red herring is not ...

It’s not controlled misdirection (according to my framework)
Controlled misdirection uses true information that’s misinterpreted. A red herring may include this, but its defining feature is the construction of a complete but ultimately false explanation.

It’s not a twist
Twists are sudden, unexpected revelations that reshape a reader’s interpretation of earlier events and alter their understanding of the story. In short, they resolve uncertainty, whereas red herrings prolong it by sending the reader down the wrong path.

It’s not foreshadowing
Foreshadowing plants early clues or hints that later gain meaning, while a red herring builds a complete but false path that’s later exposed as untrue.

It’s not factual deception
A red herring does not mislead the reader about facts. Instead, it misleads them about the explanation those facts appear to support.
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It’s not withholding
Withholding is about timing – when information is revealed. A red herring is about what explanation the reader is encouraged to believe, not when information appears.

How red herrings work: The mechanics

Here’s a simple framework for constructing effective red herrings, followed by a couple of examples of the mechanism in practice.

  1. The setup: A plausible false path is introduced: A suspect, motive or explanation is presented with enough surface evidence to feel credible.
  2. The reinforcement: The false theory gains support: Additional details reinforce the path, creating a coherent narrative.
  3. The commitment: The reader adopts the theory: The explanation becomes emotionally and logically satisfying enough to feel ‘solved’.
  4. The collapse: The truth invalidates the path: New information reveals the explanation cannot account for key facts.

Below are a couple of examples from two published novels. I’ve framed the analyses broadly so that they focus on the mechanisms rather than any plot details. However, if these books are on your reading list, perhaps come back to this article when you’ve devoured the novels. That way, you’ll enter those fictional worlds completely green.

These examples show how the same underlying mechanism can operate at different levels: worldbuilding in one case, and character psychology in another.

Example 1: The Bedlam Stacks, by Natasha Pulley 
Pulley’s novel is a smashing example of how a red herring can go beyond suspects and be structural, working on how the story’s world works.

The setup
  • The story introduces a remote, unfamiliar setting with unusual environmental and cultural conditions that appear to follow an initially unfamiliar but still seemingly explainable logic. 

The reinforcement
  • The reader (alongside the protagonist) forms a working explanation of how the environment, local phenomena and events are functioning based on incomplete early information.

The commitment
  • The explanatory path feels convincing because it’s supported by consistent observable information, partial knowledge and familiar real-world assumptions.

The collapse
  • As the story progresses, readers discover that they need to revise their initial understanding of earlier events and observations. 

Example 2: Gone Girl, by Gillian Flynn
Flynn’s novel is an excellent example of layered red herrings based around people and psychology.

The setup
  • The story presents a missing-person case within a marriage, framed through competing accounts of events, behaviour and relationship history.

The reinforcement
  • The reader forms shifting but coherent theories about what happened, with a particular focus on one character as the most likely cause of the central event.

The commitment
  • Each explanatory path feels convincing at the time because it’s supported by selective evidence, emotionally persuasive testimony and apparently consistent behavioural patterns.

The collapse
  • As new information is introduced, earlier theories are repeatedly invalidated or reframed, forcing the reader to abandon their previous conclusions in favour of new ones.

Summing up

A strong red herring should distract the reader’s attention, but it must do so in a way that makes them believe in what is a complete and  convincing explanation of the mystery, even though it will ultimately prove false.
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The key is to stick to the golden rules so that readers are confidently wrong, but for the right reasons. 

About Louise Harnby

Louise Harnby is a line editor, copyeditor and proofreader who specializes in working with crime, mystery, suspense and thriller writers.

She is an Advanced Professional Member of the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CIEP) and co-hosts The Editing Podcast.

  • Get in touch: Louise Harnby | Crime Fiction & Thriller Editor
  • Connect: X @LouiseHarnby, Facebook and LinkedIn
  • Learn: Books and courses
  • Discover: Resources for authors and editors
1 Comment

Controlled misdirection in crime fiction and thrillers: Shaping interpretation

19/5/2026

3 Comments

 
Learn how to use controlled misdirection to guide your reader towards convincing but incorrect interpretations, and build deeper, more engaging mysteries.
Picture

In this post

  • What is controlled misdirection?
  • What’s the difference between a red herring and controlled misdirection?
  • Writing controlled misdirection: The golden rules
  • What controlled misdirection is not: Common misconceptions
  • How controlled misdirection works: The mechanics (with examples)

What is controlled misdirection?

Controlled misdirection is a deliberate storytelling technique that leads the reader towards a convincing but incorrect interpretation of information.

When done well, it doesn’t feel like a trick but like something natural and logical – even though, later, that information will turn out to be incomplete or misjudged.

What’s the difference between a red herring and controlled misdirection?

I like to separate controlled misdirection from red herrings because the latter feels heavier. Red herrings work by building a false but plausible explanatory path that steers the reader towards an incorrect conclusion, only to collapse later under the weight of the real solution.

However, sometimes writers like to introduce other points of misdirection that are less weighty. These focus not on shaping the conclusion, but how information is interpreted in the moment.

The writer presents accurate, relevant details in a way that encourages the reader (and often the protagonist) to infer the wrong meaning from them. That’s what I call ‘controlled misdirection’.

>> Find out more about red herrings here.

Key distinction
At their core, the difference is this:

Controlled misdirection shapes how the reader interprets information, while red herrings construct a complete but ultimately false explanation.
​
In practice, both can appear alongside each other in crime fiction. They’re just operating slightly differently.

Writing controlled misdirection: The golden rules

All controlled misdirection should be:
  • believable: The incorrect interpretation must feel entirely plausible within the story. Focus on how character motives, circumstances or evidence can be reasonably misread. If the interpretation feels forced, readers will recognize the manipulation and disengage from your story.
  • true to perspective: Misdirection must respect the limits of your narrative point of view. In restricted or limited POV (common in crime fiction and thrillers), the reader can only interpret what the viewpoint character could realistically observe, infer or misunderstand.
  • relevant: Misdirection should connect meaningfully to the story’s central logic, otherwise it becomes clutter and risks frustrating the reader. 
  • grounded in truth: The underlying information should be accurate and meaningful. Controlled misdirection works best when the reader isn’t being deceived by falsehoods, but by how those truths are framed and understood.
  • timely: Introduce the misdirection early enough that it can genuinely compete with the real solution in the reader’s mind. If it appears too late, readers might already be committed to the correct interpretation, making the misdirection feel artificial or forced.
  • substantial: Readers of crime and thriller fiction expect to be misled, but the misdirecting details must be substantial enough that, in hindsight, it feels convincing rather than flimsy. Thin or superficial distractions won’t earn that reaction.
  • specific: Effective misdirection points towards a clear, incorrect interpretation rather than vague ambiguity. Ambiguity has its place, but misdirection works best when the reader feels confident in their reasoning.
  • restrained: Too much competing misdirection can overwhelm the reader and become difficult to manage within the story. It’s better if you use a few well-developed misdirections that readers can invest in, rather than a large number that risk confusion.
  • resolved: Every misdirection should be accounted for by the end of the story so that readers understand how they were misled and where the truth actually lay. This makes the experience feel fair.

What controlled misdirection is not: Common misconceptions

Here’s what controlled misdirection isn’t.

It’s not a lie
Controlled misdirection isn’t a licence to mislead readers with false information. The reader is given accurate details, but encouraged to interpret them in a particular way.

It’s not a twist
Twists are sudden, unexpected revelations that reshape a reader’s interpretation of earlier events and alter their understanding of the story. In short, they resolve uncertainty, whereas controlled misdirection seeks to prolong it.

It’s not a red herring (according to my framework) 
It’s not a red herring, at least in the classical sense, though the two often operate in close proximity in contemporary crime fiction and thrillers.

Think of it like this: Controlled misdirection gives the reader true information, but shapes how they interpret it. A red herring, by contrast, introduces a coherent but ultimately false theory that steers the reader towards an incorrect conclusion.

It’s not foreshadowing
Controlled misdirection and foreshadowing can look similar on the surface but they’re actually working in two different directions.

Controlled misdirection points away from the truth, guides the reader to an interpretation that feels right at the time, but turns out to be incomplete or incorrect, whereas foreshadowing nudges the reader towards it.

It’s not withholding
Withholding is about when information is revealed – it's a timing choice. Controlled misdirection, on the other hand, is active in the present and guides the reader towards an incorrect interpretation – ​it’s a shaping choice.

How controlled misdirection works: The mechanics

Here’s a quick 4-step framework, followed by a couple of worked examples, that you can use to build effective misdirection.

  1. The setup: Readers are given accurate, relevant information
  2. The misdirect: That information is interpreted incorrectly
  3. The justification: The incorrect interpretation feels plausible at the time
  4. The turn: The information is later reinterpreted correctly

Below are two examples of controlled misdirection in action.

Example 1: Misdirection through forensic interpretation
The setup: Readers are given accurate, relevant information
  • A man is found dead in his office late at night. There are no injuries and no signs of forced entry, just a collapsed body and a half-finished drink on his desk.
  • A toxicology report identifies a rare industrial compound in the victim’s bloodstream. Trace amounts are also found on the rim of his glass.

The misdirect: The information is interpreted incorrectly
  • Investigators conclude that the victim was deliberately poisoned using this compound, most likely by putting it into his drink.

The justification: The incorrect interpretation is plausible at the time
  • The compound is used in industrial cleaning products and isn’t something the victim would likely have come into contact with accidentally.
  • A cleaning contractor had access to the office and the chemical, and a batch of the compound appears to be unaccounted for. 
  • The forensic evidence seems consistent and reliable, which reinforces the poisoning theory.

The turn: Later, this information can be reinterpreted correctly
  • It’s discovered that the victim was taking medication that, when combined with alcohol, produces the same chemical signature at the cleaning compound. It’s this reaction, not deliberate poisoning, that caused the death.
  • The trace residue on the glass came from routine cleaning, and the missing batch is traced to a logging error. 
  • The initial toxicology result was technically accurate but misinterpreted, pointing investigators in the wrong direction until new information allowed the evidence to be correctly understood.

Example 2: Misdirection through behavioural interpretation
The setup: Readers are given accurate, relevant information
  • A woman is found dead in her home. There are no signs of forced entry. Neighbours recall hearing an argument the night before. 
  • Her husband says he discovered the body. He has no clear alibi for the estimated time of death and seems unusually calm when he’s interviewed.
  • Financial records show he recently increased her life insurance policy, and he has a fresh scratch on his wrist.

The misdirect: The information is interpreted incorrectly
  • Investigators conclude that the husband killed his wife, likely following a domestic dispute, with financial gain as a possible motive.

The justification: The incorrect interpretation is plausible at the time
  • The marital tension, lack of alibi and financial incentive align with the investigator theory and follow a pattern they’ve seen before.
  • The physical mark suggests a struggle, and the husband’s demeanour during questioning is interpreted as detachment or concealment. 

The turn: Later, this information can be reinterpreted correctly
  • It’s revealed that the argument was about the victim’s worsening illness and her refusal of further treatment. The life insurance policy had been increased to cover medical costs and provide security. 
  • The scratch came from the husband’s attempt to revive her. 
  • His calmness was the result of shock, not guilt. 
  • The evidence was accurate, but its meaning had been misread, directing suspicion toward an innocent man while the true cause of death lay elsewhere.

Summing up

Effective controlled misdirection doesn’t make the reader feel tricked. Rather, it makes them realize that they formed an interpretation that felt logical at the time, given the information available, but turned out to be incorrect.

About Louise Harnby

Louise Harnby is a line editor, copyeditor and proofreader who specializes in working with crime, mystery, suspense and thriller writers.

She is an Advanced Professional Member of the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CIEP) and co-hosts The Editing Podcast.

  • Get in touch: Louise Harnby | Crime Fiction & Thriller Editor
  • Connect: X @LouiseHarnby, Facebook and LinkedIn
  • Learn: Books and courses
  • Discover: Resources for authors and editors

3 Comments

7 types of thriller opening lines (with examples from bestselling novels)

9/4/2026

2 Comments

 
Explore seven effective types of thriller opening lines, and how published novelists are using them to convince their audiences to keep on reading.
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In this article

  • The recognizable patterns in thriller opening lines
  • First-line focus on a pursuit
  • First-line focus on psychological mindset
  • First-line focus on a shocking statement
  • First-line focus on a crime or transgression
  • First-line focus on the environment
  • First-line focus on foreboding

The recognizable patterns in thriller opening lines

The opening line of a thriller has a difficult job. In a single sentence it must capture attention and convince readers that the story is worth their time.

While great first lines vary in style, there are some recognizable patterns. Understanding these can help writers craft first sentences that hook readers immediately.
​
Below we’ll look at seven types of thriller opening lines – each illustrated with examples from published novels – and examine why they work and what writers can learn from them.

What these opening lines have in common

Despite their differences, superb thriller first lines usually share several notable qualities:
​
  • Stakes: suggests that a character’s in danger or facing a threatening predicament
  • Curiosity: creates intrigue whereby readers have at least one question they want answered
  • Tension or conflict: hints that something is wrong
  • Voice: Establishes a tone that makes us interested or invested in the narrator
  • Momentum:  Gives the reader a reason to keep moving through the prose.

1. First-line focus on a pursuit

Some thrillers begin with motion already underway: someone is chasing, escaping or searching.

Example: The Gunslinger, Stephen King (Hodder Paperback edition, 2003)
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​The man in black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed.
​Why it works
Readers are thrust straight into the middle of a high-stakes chase. In a single line, we sense the tension: one character fleeing, another in pursuit. The sentence immediately conveys motion, suspense and intrigue, and prompts questions like: Who are these figures and what is at stake?
​
NOTABLE QUALITIES: Curiosity | Tension or conflict | Momentum

Lesson for writers
Movement signals urgency. Starting with that signals that the story is already underway and that the reader has arrived in the middle of something important.

2. First-line focus on psychological mindset

These first lines hook readers by revealing a shocking fact, personal truth or secret. They often feel rather confessional create powerful psychological intrigue because they invite readers into a character’s headspace.

Example 1: Dark Places, Gillian Flynn (Phoenix edition, 2010)
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I have a meanness inside me, real as an organ.
Why it works
The opening plunges readers into the narrator’s psyche, exposing an unsettling inner darkness before any plot events occur. This early insight builds psychological tension, making us question the narrator’s reliability and wonder how their mindset will shape the story.

NOTABLE QUALITIES: ​Curiosity | Tension or conflict | Voice

Example 2: The Martian, Andy Weir (Del Rey edition, 2014)
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​​I’m pretty much fucked.
Why it works
In those first four words, the narrator signals that disaster has struck. The candid, no-nonsense tone generates immediate suspense, encouraging readers to ask: What has happened? How will the character cope?

NOTABLE QUALITIES: Stakes | Curiosity | Tension or conflict | Voice

​Lesson for writers
Confessional first lines can draw readers directly into a character’s predicament or provide striking psychological insight in just a few words. These two examples are also good reminders that a strong narrative voice can be just as compelling as action or a crime.

3. First-line focus on a shocking statement

A bold or disturbing statement can grab readers immediately, forcing them to confront moral tension or danger.

Example: I Will Find You, Harlan Coben (Penguin edition, 2023)
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I am serving the fifth year of a life sentence for murdering my own child.
Why it works
A single, startling sentence conveys both shock and intrigue. It instantly raises questions and emotional stakes. Readers want to understand the circumstances that led the narrator, speaking directly to us, to this moment.

NOTABLE QUALITIES: Stakes | Curiosity | Tension or conflict | Voice | Momentum
​

Lesson for writers
A single unexpected statement can create a powerful hook if it suggests a deeper story.

5. First-line focus on a crime or transgression

Some thrillers’ opening lines reveal a crime or transgression that has already occurred or is in progress.

Example: Paradise, Toni Morrison (Vintage edition, 1999)
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​They shoot the white girl first.
Why it works
The sentence is shocking, violent and blunt, though we’re not given any context. That ambiguity forces readers to ask questions: Who are ‘they’? Who are the other girls that it’s implied are also going to be shot? Why have these girls been targeted?

NOTABLE QUALITIES: Curiosity | Tension or conflict | Momentum
​

Lesson for writers
Introducing the crime early tells readers exactly what kind of story they’re entering.

6. First-line focus on the environment 

Some thrillers begin by establishing an unsettling atmosphere.

Example 1: Neuromancer, William Gibson (Gateway edition, 2016)
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The sky above the port was the colour of television, tuned to a dead channel.
Why it works
This line uses a striking image to establish a bleak, dystopian environment. It signals that the world of the story may feel strange or unsettling.

NOTABLE QUALITIES: Tension or conflict | Voice

Example 2: The Day of the Jackal, Frederick Forsyth (Arrow edition, 2011)
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​It is cold at six-forty in the morning of a March day in Paris, and seems even colder when a man is about to be executed by firing squad.
Why it works
This opening sentence starts with information about the weather and the time. It could have been dull, but the author uses it as an artful anchor for the life‑or‑death clause that follows. The stark, cold setting mirrors the flat, cold voice, as if the narrator has accepted the inevitability of the execution.

NOTABLE QUALITIES: Stakes | Tension or conflict | Voice
​

Lesson for writers
A vivid or unusual image can establish tone while creating curiosity about the setting. And environmental information can be highly effective as long as it’s used to amplify a character’s mood.

7. First-line focus on foreboding

This type of opening signals that something terrible has already happened, or is about to happen.

Example 1: Everybody Knows, Jordan Harper (Faber & Faber edition, 2023)
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​Los Angeles burns. 
Why it works
In just three stark words, this first line establishes a vivid, ominous setting that suggests chaos and danger. Something catastrophic is happening in a familiar city, and readers want to know what caused it and what the consequences will be.

NOTABLE ​QUALITIES: Stakes | Curiosity | Tension or conflict | Momentum

Example 2: Gone Before Goodbye, Harlan Coben and Reese Witherspoon (Penguin, 2026)​
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​I don’t hear the scream.
Why it works
In just five words, this line creates immediate tension. By emphasizing what the narrator doesn’t hear, it heightens the sense of unseen danger. The absence of sound signals that something is amiss, prompting readers to ask: What’s happening, and what threat lurks nearby?

NOTABLE ​QUALITIES: Curiosity | Tension or conflict | Momentum

​Lesson for writers
Opening lines that imply catastrophe, danger or abnormality can be incredibly effective. By hinting that something is wrong, rather than explaining it immediately,  activate the reader’s curiosity and tension, and compel them to keep going.

Summing up

A thriller’s first line doesn’t have to feature explosions or violence. What matters is that it avoids the mundane.

That means encouraging questions and making the reader feel something – for example shock, surprise, disgust, fear, confusion – so that they want to continue beyond the opening sentence and into the rest of the story.

​​About Louise Harnby

Louise Harnby is a line editor, copyeditor and proofreader who specializes in working with crime, mystery, suspense and thriller writers.

She is an Advanced Professional Member of the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CIEP) and co-hosts The Editing Podcast.

  • Get in touch: Louise Harnby | Crime Fiction & Thriller Editor
  • Connect: X @LouiseHarnby, Facebook and LinkedIn
  • Learn: Books and courses
  • Discover: Resources for authors and editors​

2 Comments

10 weak first lines in mysteries and thrillers (and how to fix them)

2/4/2026

1 Comment

 
Explore 10 weak thriller opening lines and learn how to turn them into compelling hooks that grab the reader, set the tone and hint at something that piques their curiosity.
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The weight carried by the opening line

The opening line of a mystery or thriller carries an enormous amount of weight. In just a few words, it has to hook the reader, set the tone and indicate a problem or predicament that will pique the reader’s interest.

Manuscripts with first lines that feature routine description, backstory or everyday dialogue can feel flat rather than gripping.

In this article, we’ll look at 10 examples of weak first lines, explain why they don’t work, and show how small revisions can turn them into compelling hooks.

If you’re writing a mystery, crime novel or psychological thriller, these examples will help you craft a first sentence that immediately grabs readers … and keeps them wanting to read.

Example 1: Generic description

​Weak first line
  • It was a cold and rainy night in the city.
Why it’s ineffective
The description is generic and objective. There’s no character, no tension and no intrigue.

Suggested improvement
  • The rain washed the blood toward the storm drain before anyone noticed the body.
Why the revision helps
The objectivity remains, but now the reader is immediately introduced to a crime – one that makes us ask questions: Whose body? How did they die? And by whose hand?

Example 2: Routine activity

Weak first line
  • Detective Harris sat down at his desk and found the murder weapon waiting for him. ​
Why it’s ineffective
While there’s a human being involved in this line, Harris’s actions are mundane. The sentence is front loaded with activity related to where he sits. Even though a murder weapon is mentioned, that’s not particularly interesting given the detective’s job.
There’s no reason for us to do anything with this line than skim over it.

Suggested improvement
  • Detective Harris stared at the murder weapon – handcrafted blade, premium steel, artisan finish, and identical to the one his son had bought only four days earlier.
Why the revision helps
Now there’s a conundrum for us to consider – the familiarity of the weapon. This creates a pressure point for Harris, and a mystery that readers want an explanation for.

Example 3: Focus on backstory 

Weak first line
  • Martha had always loved living in the quiet town of Hemsby.
Why it’s ineffective
The focus here is on the past rather than the present, and that backstory is generalised and mundane.

Suggested improvement
  • The first dead body in Hemsby appeared three houses down from Martha’s front door.
​Why the revision helps
Now there’s momentum. The word ‘first’ introduces foreshadowing – readers will assume that there’s more than one dead body. The mention of proximity to a named character forces us to wonder about her role: Is Martha a potential victim, too, or is she a transgressor?  

Example 4: No intrigue

Weak first line
  • John woke up early that morning and checked the time.
Why it’s ineffective
So what? the reader might think. Waking up early in the morning is not intriguing. It’s commonplace.

Suggested improvement
  • John woke to the sound of someone unlocking his front door.
Why the revision helps
Now there’s immediate tension. The word ‘someone’ implies that another person entering the house is unexpected. And yet ‘unlocking’ suggests they have a key. That leads to readers asking questions: Who’s in his space? Should they be there? Is John in danger?

Example 5: Vague observation

Weak first line
  • The small town felt peaceful that morning.
Why it’s ineffective
This line tells us readers nothing about why they should care about this peaceful place, nor why they should carry on reading about it.
​
Suggested improvement
  • The town felt peaceful – until the police divers pulled the suitcase out of the lake.
Why the revision helps
The revised line is still told from an objective perspective, and the peacefulness has been left intact. However, that information is now sharply juxtaposed with a shocking discovery. Using contrast helps to create surprise and intrigue.

Example 6: Dull dialogue

Weak first line
  • “Morning,” Tom said as he poured coffee.
Why it’s ineffective
This is mundane speech – the kind of thing millions of people say to each other at times and spaces across the entire planet. It won’t compel a reader to continue.
​
Suggested improvement
  • “I didn’t do it,” Tom said, though in truth he couldn’t be sure.
Why the revision helps
Now we have an instant mystery. Readers will wonder what the ‘it’ is that Tom didn’t do, and they’ll want to know why he’s doubting himself. 

Example 7: Tensionless thoughts

Weak first line
  • Emily drove to work, thinking about her busy day.
Why it’s ineffective
There’s no pressure point in this character thought. It’s skimmable information.
​
Suggested improvement
  • Emily was halfway to work when the radio announced that her husband had been murdered.
Why the revision helps
Now we understand the possible emotional stakes in play. Maybe this information comes as a horrific shock to Emily. Or maybe it will be revealed that she killed him. It actually doesn’t matter. All that’s important is that this is personal, and the reader will be invested in understanding why. 

Example 8: Boring environment

Weak first line
  • The office building is large and modern.
Why it’s ineffective
The description feels flat and doesn’t convey any personality or tension.
​
Suggested improvement
  • ​The modern office block has thirty floors, but I’ll need only one to end Xavier Flint’s life.
Why the revision helps
Now we have an anonymous narrator with a clear agenda. While the motive is as yet unclear, which creates suspense, the tone is distinctly menacing. Readers will be wondering who this character is and what Flint’s done to evoke such anger.

Example 9: Flat impact

Weak first line
  • The police station is bustling when the missing girl walks through the door.
Why it’s ineffective
This at least introduces an interesting premise – that of the return of a missing person. However, it feels a little flat and lacks impact.
​
Suggested improvement
  • Sally Flowers has been missing for eleven years, three months and two days – and she’s just walked through the door.
Why the revision helps
In the revised version, the missing person has a name. And by leading with punchy description of how long Flowers has been missing for, the follow-up clause about her unexpected return creates shock and intrigue.

Example 10: No threat

Weak first line
  • You take an envelope from the mailbox, open it, and remove a photograph.
Why it’s ineffective
While the use of a second-person narrative hints at voyeurism, there’s nothing in that line that indicates anything’s out of whack.
​
Suggested improvement
  • The envelope you’ve taken from the mailbox contains a photograph – of you last night, sleeping.
Why the revision helps
The expository information about the mailbox, envelope and photograph are still there, as is the voyeuristic narration. However, by giving readers a small nudge about what’s in that image, there’s an imminent sense of threat.

Summing up

A great opening line to any thriller or mystery usually does at least one of these things:

  • Stakes: suggests that a character’s in danger or facing a threatening predicament
  • Curiosity: creates intrigue whereby readers have at least one question they want answered
  • Tension or conflict: hints that something is wrong
  • Voice: Establishes a tone that makes us interested or invested in the narrator
  • Momentum:  Gives the reader a reason to keep moving through the prose.

If these aren't evident in your first line, it’s worth revisiting.

About Louise Harnby

Louise Harnby is a line editor, copyeditor and proofreader who specializes in working with crime, mystery, suspense and thriller writers.

She is an Advanced Professional Member of the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CIEP) and co-hosts The Editing Podcast.

  • Get in touch: Louise Harnby | Crime Fiction & Thriller Editor
  • Connect: X @LouiseHarnby, Facebook and LinkedIn
  • Learn: Books and courses
  • Discover: Resources for authors and editors

1 Comment

Character names in crime fiction, mysteries and thrillers

21/3/2026

4 Comments

 
Learn about why character names matter, how to approach the ‘hard-to-pronounce’ issue, and practical strategies for making your characters memorable, readable and believable.
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In this article

  • Why character names are more than just labels
  • Why names matter
  • Embracing diversity in character naming
  • ‘Hard-to-pronounce’ names
  • Helping readers with pronunciation
  • Helping readers with naming conventions
  • Names as character signposts
  • Balancing uniqueness with readability
  • The role of nicknames and titles
  • Testing names in context
  • Other common pitfalls to watch out for

Why character names are more than just labels

The name you choose for a character is a vital part of storytelling. A well-chosen name can signal personality, social background, culture or even foreshadow events in your story.

On the other hand, confusing, repetitive or inconsistent names can pull readers out of the narrative, making them struggle to remember your characters or follow the plot.
​
In this article, we’ll explore why character names matter, how to approach the ‘hard-to-pronounce’ issue, and look at some practical strategies for making your characters memorable, readable and believable.

Why names matter

A character’s name is often the first thing a reader learns about them. It can:

  • suggest age, gender identity or cultural background
  • indicate personality traits or social class
  • reinforce thematic elements or foreshadow events.

For example, in one of Jeff Carson’s series, the protagonist is called ‘David Wolf’. This evokes a certain intelligence, strength and cunning that blends familiarity with a primal, instinctive edge.

In Chris Brookmyre’s Places of Darkness – a novel set in the future and on a vast space station orbiting earth – the cynical security officer entangled in organized crime is called Nikki Freeman. The first name feels casual and friendly, while the last name suggests autonomy, resilience and someone unbound by convention or authority.

Consider also these two examples from Philip K Dick novels:

  • Ragle Gumm – from The Zap Gun. This is a quirky, almost comic name that reflects the character’s unusual circumstances.
  • Pris Stratton – from Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?. This is a memorable and evocative name that blends beauty and artificiality.

Dick’s names often balance familiarity with eccentricity, helping readers navigate surreal, speculative worlds while subtly suggesting character traits or thematic resonance.
​
Beyond meaning, names help readers track characters across scenes. In novels with large casts and complex plots, distinct names prevent confusion. 

Embracing diversity in character naming

Today’s literary landscape is global, and character names reflect that. A name might be culturally or regionally specific, and can reflect both real-world multiculturalism and the inventive worlds of speculative crime and mystery fiction.

Speculative fiction, fantasy, science fiction and other world-building genres have long embraced invented names to convey a sense of otherworldliness or cultural specificity. In crime fiction, mystery and thrillers, readers are also increasingly encountering names from cultures and regions that they may not be familiar with.

Regional branches of the noir tradition in particular – French, Tartan, Nordic, Afro, Asian – are rich and popular, and explore human weakness, moral uncertainty and the darker side of society. With that, we get characters who have authentic names, the pronunciation of which may not at first sight be obvious  to some readers:

Examples include:
​
  • Mma Precious Ramotswe, the wise and compassionate sleuth (The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency series by Alexander McCall Smith)
  • Keita Mori, the brilliant and enigmatic Japanese watchmaker with an unusual memory and remarkable abilities (The Watchmaker of Filigree Street by Natasha Pulley)
  • Kacper Ryx, the protagonist investigator who tackles theft and other mysteries in sixteenth‑century Kraków (Zły by Leopold Tyrmand)
  • Inspector Sartaj Singh, the weary Sikh police officer, and Ganesh Gaitonde, the notorious crime lord (Sacred Games by Vikram Chandra)

‘Hard-to-pronounce’ names

When thinking the challenges of pronunciation, we need to start with a question: Hard to pronounce for whom?

When we say that a name’s hard to pronounce, we have to recognize that all we’re doing is reflecting our own personal perceptions and language abilities. There is no such thing as a universally ‘hard-to-pronounce’ name.

What I – as a white, British person who’s something of a monoglot and not nearly as well travelled as I’d like to be – might find hard to pronounce is not what someone else might struggle with.

Consider the examples I gave above – Mma Precious Ramotswe, Keita Mori, Kacper Ryx, Sartaj Singh and Ganesh Gaitonde. Those with a more intimate knowledge of life in Botswana, Japan, Poland and India would not need help pronouncing those character names in the way I would.
​
The answer isn’t to choose alternative names and rip the authenticity from the novel in service of Western European or North American readers' comfort zones. Instead, authors wanting to help out their audience and maximise engagement can take various steps …

Helping readers with pronunciation

It’s great to see diversity in the genre because this reflects the diversity in the readership base. Authors, however, do have to recognize that naming characters in ways that are universally accessible (at least on first read) is an impossible task.

That diversity will necessarily introduce challenges for some, and names that feel unfamiliar could trip them up and cause disengagement, no matter how brilliant the plot.

The solution is to offer gentle cues that feel natural to the story, rather than forcing explanations on readers. That way, authors can maintain the narrative flow while helping readers engage.

Some strategies could include:
​
Phonetic hints in dialogue
Show characters correcting pronunciation naturally. For example:
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‘It’s pronounced “Ah-LEE-ah”, not “Alia”,’ she said.
That’s the approach Pulley takes in The Watchmaker of Filigree Street to help readers pronounce Keita Mori’s name.
​

Contextual clues
You could use other characters’ reactions or narrative descriptions to reinforce pronunciation subtly. For example, a viewpoint character’s narrative might go as follows:
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Again, he stumbled over the guy’s first name as he called it out. Corrected himself – tee-BOH – and glanced over at the new recruit. Thibault didn’t seem to mind, just nodded and smiled.
Glossaries or appendices
It’s not uncommon in fantasy and science fiction to include glossaries that list pronunciation alongside character names, locations and worldbuilding terms. This can be an option for crime and thriller writers too.

Helping readers with naming conventions

Some readers may be unfamiliar with naming conventions in other parts of the world. These can signal:

  • power dynamics (boss versus subordinate)
  • respect, familiarity or insult
  • cultural hierarchy within police forces, gangs and families.

​Example
In Jar City, Arnaldur Indriðason's detective and criminal characters refer to each other by first name, which reflects the patronymic naming convention in Iceland and how first names don't always indicate social intimacy.​

Explaining to readers
Crime and thriller writers can follow Indriðason's approach by including an explanatory note for readers in the front matter of the book.  

This helps the audience understand social nuance, hierarchy and cultural authenticity, which are especially important in novels where status matters.

Names as character signposts

Names can also act as subtle character signposts. They can hint at personality, social standing or plot function.
  • Personality: Short, punchy names can suggest energy or sharpness, for example ‘Max,’ ‘Tess,’ ‘Jack.’ Longer, more formal names might convey authority, tradition, or aristocracy, for example ‘Bartholomew’ or ‘Alexandria.’
  • Role in story: Villainous characters sometimes have harder, harsher-sounding names that can echo danger, like ‘Malvolo’ or ‘Draven.’ Protagonists might have smoother, friendlier-sounding names. Think about your subgenre and audience and be careful not to overdo it! Transgressors don’t usually walk around announcing their bad intentions – they look like regular people and are named like regular people.
  • Cultural or historical grounding: Carefully chosen names enrich characterization without requiring exposition. A character’s name can reflect their heritage, era or social milieu, which can add realism and depth. For example, the last name 'Singh' could be used to denote a person’s spiritual identity and commitment, and the community to which they belong. 
  • Reader tracking: In crime fiction, a memorable name helps readers track multiple suspects and allies. If there’s a crossover into speculative fiction, names can help establish cultural identity for different kingdoms or species.

Balancing uniqueness with readability

The trick is finding the sweet spot between authenticity, uniqueness and readability. Here are two practical tips:

Distinctiveness
Distinctiveness is particularly important in crime fiction, mysteries and thrillers so that readers don’t end up confusing suspects, detectives and witnesses.

  • Avoid having characters with the same name: Your reader won’t thank you if there are four people with the name ‘John’.
  • Consider whether your characters’ names sound too similar. For example, a ‘Sara’ and ‘Sarah’ in the same novel could confuse readers. So might two characters with the last names ‘Swainston’ and ‘Swanton’.

Pronounceable structure
Names should be speakable, even if that means helping your reader learn how to speak them (as discussed above). 

The role of nicknames and titles

A carefully applied nickname or title can prevent confusion while reinforcing personality or status, especially in ensemble casts.

Nicknames
These can make characters more approachable or signal relationships. One of my authors, whose characters were Polish, took this approach and it was very effective. A police officer with the last name ‘Cherniawski’ was often referred to in narrative and dialogue as Cheri, when it was appropriate to do so.

As well as signalling intimacy between characters, it also helped Western European and North American audiences shift their attention away from pronunciation and towards character action.

Titles or ranks
These are especially useful in crime, military or political fiction, for example ‘Detective Rivera’ or ‘Captain Leong’.

Aliases

These can add mystery or misdirection, particularly in thrillers and espionage.

Testing names in context

Before finalizing names, test them to make sure they work.

Read them aloud
Reading aloud is a valuable exercise in crime fiction and thrillers, where names will appear frequently in dialogue, police reports and investigative notes. A character’s name should flow within the prose rather than interrupting it.

Ask beta readers
Can they pronounce the characters’ names easily? If they’re struggling, but you’re committed to retaining the name for the purpose of authenticity, check whether there are cues you can introduce to help readers learn quickly.

Check context
Do the names you’ve chosen fit within the cultural or regional context of the novel?

Two common pitfalls to watch out for

When naming characters, watch out for:

1. Unintentional associations
You may have created characters whose heritage is different from your own. Do some research to ensure that your characters’ names don’t inadvertently evoke real people, brands or stereotypes, particularly if those conflict with the character’s persona.

For example, unless you’re writing satirical crime fiction, it won’t make sense to call a lazy, overweight investigator ‘Venus Williams’. The reader will all too frequently end up thinking of an athletic superstar, and your characterization will be undermined. Google Search is your friend here.

2. Inconsistency (especially across series)
Check that characters’ names are spelled consistently and that their titles are consistent. Ms Abi Starling shouldn’t become Miss Abby Sterling.

Maintaining a character list or spreadsheet with name spellings, nicknames and relationships can help you keep track of consistency, especially if you’re writing a book series.

A handy little tool you can use for this purpose, if you’re working in Word, is a macro called ProperNounAlyse.

Summing up

A character’s name is one of the first things a reader encounters, and it often lingers long after the story ends. Thoughtfully chosen names improve clarity, reinforce characterization and deepen immersion.

Even hard-to-pronounce or culturally specific names can work beautifully when authors provide cues, context and consistency.

In short, the best names are:
​
  • Memorable: Readers recall them easily.
  • Consistent: Spelling and usage never shift.
  • Authentic: They fit the character’s culture, background and story world.
  • Readable: They flow in prose and dialogue without tripping readers up.

About Louise Harnby

Louise Harnby is a line editor, copyeditor and proofreader who specializes in working with crime, mystery, suspense and thriller writers.

She is an Advanced Professional Member of the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CIEP) and co-hosts The Editing Podcast.

  • Get in touch: Louise Harnby | Crime Fiction & Thriller Editor
  • Connect: X @LouiseHarnby, Facebook and LinkedIn
  • Learn: Books and courses
  • Discover: Resources for authors and editors

4 Comments

Self-editing checklist for crime, mystery and thriller writers

20/3/2026

3 Comments

 
Before you send your manuscript to an agent, editor or beta reader, use this comprehensive 10-step checklist to ensure your story is as tight, compelling and credible as possible.
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Why self-editing is part of the writing process

A loose end, unconvincing motive, lack of tension and suspense, or mistimed reveal can unravel an otherwise gripping story. For that reason, self-editing is more than just a final step. Instead, think of it as a critical part of your writing craft process. 

Check #1: Plot and structure: Does the mystery hold up?

Start with the backbone of your story: the plot.

Strong crime fiction and thrillers typically follow a clear trajectory – setup, investigation, escalation and resolution. That doesn’t mean the novel has to be predictable, but the reader does need to be able to see the logic in the events as they unfold.

In particular, ask yourself whether there any coincidences that solve too problems conveniently. It’s important that any key twists feel earned, rather than shoehorned in to make the story work.

Pay special attention to your ending. A satisfying resolution should feel both surprising and inevitable.
​
TIP: One useful technique is to work backwards from the reveal. Does every major plot point support that conclusion?

Check #2: Clues and red herrings: Are you playing fair?

Crime, mystery and thriller readers love trying to solve the puzzle alongside the protagonist. That means you need to play fair.

Every crucial clue should have been planted before the reveal. That means finding a balance between keeping those clues obscure but not completely hidden. not hidden, but not obvious either.

As for red herrings, these need to mislead without feeling manipulative or obvious. If readers feel they’ve been tricked rather than challenged, the story loses credibility.
The Golden Age writers were particularly adept at this, making sure that all the pieces are there and, ultimately, fit together.

TIP: Ask yourself whether an attentive reader could solve this mystery well before the ending?

Check #3: Character behaviour: Is it consistent and logical?

In this genre, the transgressive behaviour hinges on human behaviour – the characters’ motives, opportunities and psychology.

Consistency doesn’t require that a character can’t change. They can, and in that case that change will be key to the story’s arc. However, that change needs to make sense for the reader and driven in a way that’s clear to them.

Review each major character and check that:
  • their motivations are clear and believable
  • their actions align with their personality, especially when they’re under pressure
  • the suspects are distinct enough for readers to keep track of them.
 
TIP: Pay special attention to your antagonist. Their actions must make sense within the logic of the story. A brilliant twist won’t land well if the character behind it feels underdeveloped or inconsistent.

Check #4: Character names: Are they distinct?

Confusion is the enemy of tight crime and thriller writing. And nothing’s more confusing that when characters have the same names.

Of course, that’s something we experience in everyday life, but when it comes to novel writing, readers need to be able to identify who’s who. That becomes even more important when you’re writing a series because to ensure continuity, there’ll be no going back!

Make sure that:
  • each first name is distinct to avoid confusing readers, especially when there are multiple suspects (no reader will thank you if there are four Johns and five Wills/Bills)
  • you’ve avoided overly similar-sounding first and last names or repeating initials
  • the name reflects the character’s age, culture and social context
  • you verify spelling, titles and surnames to ensure they’ve remained the same from chapter to chapter (or even book to book in a series).

TIP: Create  a simple character list or spreadsheet to track names, titles, appearances, traits and relationships.


Check #5: Timeline and continuity: Does everything add up?

Crime, mystery and thrillers often involve intricate timelines – alibis, movements, sequences of events. This is where many drafts fall apart.

Comb your draft manuscript and check the following:
  • Do all events occur in a logical order?
  • Are alibis consistent and verifiable?
  • Are there any contradictions in time, place or action?

TIP: ​Creating a separate timeline document can make this job easier. List exactly where each character is at every key moment. If something doesn’t line up there, it won’t line up for your reader either.

Check #6: Procedure: Is it plausible but engaging?

You don’t need to be a forensic expert to write in this genre, but your story does need to feel plausible, even if the setting is speculative.

Chris Brookmyre’s Places in the Darkness is a superb example. It follows a murder investigation on a near-future space station, where politics, class and human behaviour drive the mystery. Despite the speculative setting, it feels plausible because the crime – and its motives – are grounded in recognisably human conflicts.

Bear in mind that fiction can become dull if it mirrors real investigations too closely – lots of details about paperwork, delays and routine steps can drain tension and suspense.

Check the following:
  • Are investigative procedures plausible?
  • Is the forensic detail accurate within the novel’s world-build?
  • Is the forensic detail useful but not overwhelming?
  • Are legal consequences believable?

TIP: Prioritise tension over total realism. Include only the procedural details that increase the stakes, help the reader make sense of the investigation or reveal a character more deeply.


Check #7: Is the dialogue engaging and purposeful?

Dialogue is one of the most powerful tools for building tension and revealing character.

When a character’s speech focuses too much on everyday but mundane information – like discussions about the weather or how people take their coffee – readers can become bored, even though what’s being said would happen in real life.

As you edit:
  • cut any lines that don’t serve a purpose
  • ensure that each major character has a distinct and consistent voice
  • avoid using dialogue purely for exposition, sometimes called maid-and-butler dialogue.

TIP: Read your dialogue aloud. If it feels awkward to say, it’ll feel awkward to read.


Check #8: Pacing and suspense: Do they keep readers hooked?

Crime, mysteries and thrillers need to pull readers forward relentlessly.

Each scene should either advance the plot, deepen character or increase tension – ideally all three. If it doesn’t, consider cutting or rewriting it.

Look out for:
  • sections where the story drags or stalls
  • overlong descriptions that slow momentum
  • chapters that end in a way that doesn’t urge readers to turn the page.

TIP: End every chapter with a question or unresolved tension. This article has 7 suggestions that will help you do that at line level.

Check #9: Point of view: Are the shifts in perspective clear?

When readers have access to what’s going on in every character’s head in a single scene, head-hopping might be in play.

That can rip tension and suspense from your novel because readers know what everyone’s thinking and feeling. Nothing’s withheld.

More crucially, perhaps, it stops them investing in a character’s experience in the moment. The psychic distance widens and makes them feel like they’re a distant observer rather than a participant.

Of course, it’s fine to have more than one viewpoint character, but check that:
  • you’ve chosen a consistent viewpoint approach throughout the novel
  • any shifts from one character’s perspective to another’s are intentional and clearly signposted
  • you give your readers opportunities to feel almost like they’re in a single character’s head

TIP: Highlight every sentence in which there’s information that your POV character couldn’t directly perceive or know. If anything slips through (another character’s thoughts, unseen actions), you’ve broken viewpoint, and it’s time to revise so everything is filtered strictly through that character’s experience.

Check #10: Line craft: Is your writing sharp?

Effective line craft sharpens prose by making every sentence purposeful, precise and engaging. When we line edit, we’re seeking to enhance clarity, tone and rhythm and to eliminate excess.

That way the story flows smoothly and keeps readers immersed. Zoom in on your narrative and focus on the following:
  • Cutting repetition and filler.
  • Replacing vague descriptions with specific details.
  • Eliminating clichés and overused phrases.
  • Considering every adverb to make sure it’s not telling what’s already been shown through dialogue and action.

TIP: Trust your readers, then cut unnecessary words. If a word, phrase or sentence doesn’t reveal character, advance the plot or heighten tension, remove it.

Summing up

Robust self-editing will mean your draft is in the best shape possible before it goes to someone else. It might feel like a time-consuming thing to do, but it will save you time in the long run, and perhaps even money.

About Louise Harnby

Louise Harnby is a line editor, copyeditor and proofreader who specializes in working with crime, mystery, suspense and thriller writers.

She is an Advanced Professional Member of the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CIEP) and co-hosts The Editing Podcast.

  • Get in touch: Louise Harnby | Crime Fiction & Thriller Editor
  • Connect: X @LouiseHarnby, Facebook and LinkedIn
  • Learn: Books and courses
  • Discover: Resources for authors and editors

3 Comments

Why ‘good’ versus ‘bad’ binaries can harm crime fiction

2/7/2025

2 Comments

 
This post explores how oversimplifications of human motivation as  ‘good’ versus ‘evil’ can damage crime fiction, mysteries and thrillers.
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In this post

Read on to find out more about:
  • the trouble with clear-cut morality
  • turning flat caricatures into relatable characters
  • exploring justice that reflects reality
  • building tension through real-world themes.

The trouble with clear-cut morality

In real life, morality is murky. Few people do harm ‘just because’. People do bad things for complex reasons, and those in investigative roles – and apparently on the side of justice – don’t always behave impeccably.

Compelling contemporary crime fiction tends to avoid rigid binaries that present ‘good’ and ‘bad’ characters, where the villain is evil because they commit a crime, and the sleuth is good because they solve it.
​
Going down that route can weaken character development, limit emotional relatability and misrepresent how justice manifests in a way that’s plausible. 

​How to turn flat caricatures into relatable characters

In a binary model, the villain is ‘monsterized’ as inherently bad – the evil psychopath or lowlife. The focus is more on the nastiness they’ve done.

Meanwhile, the investigator is ‘heroized’ as inherently good – the wonderful restorer of order. The focus is on how they’ve saved the day.

However, when you provide a deeper understanding of the reasons why a criminal acted as they did, and when you make space for a sleuth’s flaws, doubts and moral ambiguity, readers are able to access more plausible and fully rounded characters with human backstories and worldviews, however flawed.

An example from the bookshelf
​
One of my favourite examples of a flawed law-enforcement officer is Mick Herron’s Jackson Lamb, the unkempt, chain-smoking, foul-mouthed and flatulent head of Slough House, home to MI5 agents who’ve made career-ending mistakes.

​He’s vicious but protective, revolting but brilliant, both burned out and razor-sharp, more anti-hero than saviour. It’s Lamb’s complexity that keeps readers turning the page.
Prompt for writers and editors
Check your villain and sleuth. Where are the cracks that could move them away from binary stereotypes and towards human beings that your readers feel compelled to get under the skin of?

Does the sleuth wonder if they're doing the right thing? Does the criminal regret, justify or second-guess themself? Making space for this adds tension.

Exploring justice that reflects reality

Ditching binary models of ‘good’ and ‘bad’ allows you to explore crime and justice in a way that engages readers who’ve experienced systemic injustice in real life, as well as those whose privilege means they haven’t. 

For example, a criminal’s actions might stem from something far more alarming than pure greed. It could be grounded in, or driven by, their experience of poverty, fear, abuse, racial- or class-based oppression.
​
Taking this approach asks readers to consider where biases in the system are, who the establishment serves, and whether equal opportunity really stands up under the microscope.

​Examples from the bookshelf
​When I first read The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood over thirty years ago, Aunt Lydia, one of Gilead’s enforcers, didn’t get a voice, so I had no access to her motivations as a perpetrator. In The Testaments, she finally gets to narrate. It’s a glorious study of how abuse, fear and oppression can drive the most appalling behaviours, and what deeper motivation might lie beyond.

On the surface, SA Cosby’s 
Razorblade Tears is a revenge thriller focusing on two former conmen – one Black, one white – bent on dishing out justice after their sons are murdered. But embedded within the criminality is a powerful story about grief and the prejudice each man must confront within himself. 

Prompt for writers and editors
Check your assumptions. What lived experiences do your villain and sleuth bring to the table, and how do those affect their perception of the crime, evading detection and the approach to the investigation?
​
Avoid telling readers who’s ‘right’ and who’s ‘wrong'. Instead, show them conflicting perspectives and allow them to decide for themselves.

Ask questions about your perpetrators and your investigators: What does this person want and fear? What trauma or injustice shaped their choices? Who might see them as a hero, and who might see them as a villain?

Building tension through real-world themes

Avoiding traditional ‘good’ and ‘bad’ binaries encourages space for exploring themes that cement tension throughout the novel, and speak to readers living in the world as it is now … or the one it might be in the not-too-distant future.

Through those themes, you might explore societies’ values, and what constitutes criminal behaviour in terms of your own and your readers’ values. Are there are circumstances where bad deeds might be justified for the greater good?

For example, could the perpetrator and the investigator both be grappling with thorny concepts that make who’s ‘right’ and who’s ‘wrong’ ambiguous?
​
  • Human comfort versus environmental sustainability: A resistance movement rises against a draconian regime that’s dismantled modern technology to prevent ecological collapse. Is this a fight for freedom or the beginning of a new disaster?
  • The right to knowledge versus the threat of chaos: A journalist uncovers the existence of a human-made virus so dangerous that its mere exposure could trigger global panic. Do they reveal the truth or bury it for the greater good?
  • Loyalty to the vulnerable versus telling the truth: A detective learns that their spouse has hidden evidence to protect their autistic child from prosecution. Do they uphold the law or shield their family?
  • Security versus privacy: A whistleblower leaks details of an AI system that secretly monitors millions. Is it an act of justice, betrayal or both?

​An example from the bookshelf
​
​Tom R Weaver’s debut thriller Artificial Wisdom mixes cli-fi, techno-political intrigue and ethical tension.

​It asks readers to consider whether truth matters more than survival, and whether we should trust our fate to humanity alone or something beyond it.

Prompt for writers and editors
Check your underlying themes. Which big-picture questions might you draw the reader's attention to and that don’t have clearcut answers? What happens when the system itself is unjust? What if both the criminal and sleuth are victims of the same failing structure?

Summing up

Crime fiction and thrillers can reveal uncomfortable truths about people and systems. By embracing ambiguity, you can craft more emotionally resonant and morally engaging stories.

To keep your characters interesting and out of binary waters, ask yourself whether the most compelling villain might be one who almost persuades us, and whether the most unforgettable hero might be one who almost breaks our trust.

Other resources you might like

  • Start Crime Fiction Editing: multimedia course
  • Editing Fiction at Sentence Level: book
  • Fiction editing line craft: books
  • How to Line Edit for Suspense: multimedia course
  • How to Write the Perfect Editorial Report: multimedia course
  • Narrative Distance: multimedia course
  • Resource library
  • Switching to Fiction: multimedia course​

About Louise

Louise Harnby is a line editor, copyeditor and proofreader who specializes in working with crime, mystery, suspense and thriller writers.

She is an Advanced Professional Member of the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CIEP) and co-hosts The Editing Podcast.

  • Get in touch: Louise Harnby | Crime Fiction & Thriller Editor
  • Connect: X @LouiseHarnby, Facebook and LinkedIn
  • Learn: Books and courses
  • Discover: Resources for authors and editors

2 Comments

5 tips on how to introduce backstory to crime fiction

16/6/2025

0 Comments

 
Backstory helps readers understand why characters act the way they do and what their motivations are. This post offers five tips on how to introduce it so that it enriches, rather than distracts from, the main story.
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In this post ...

Read on to find out more about:
  • what character backstory is
  • drip feeding the information
  • using natural dialogue
  • interjecting with narrative reflection
  • using other characters to reveal backstory
  • using sounds, objects or settings as triggers

What is character backstory?

Backstory is the fictional history of a character before the main plot begins. It could include past events, relationships, traumas or achievements that shape their present behaviour and decisions. Backstory should be:

  • Interesting to the reader: It should engage us. Dull or generic backstory risks slowing the pace of the story without adding anything memorable.
  • Relevant to the scene: It should be introduced at points where it helps readers make sense of what’s happening in a particular scene, otherwise it will feel like dislocated filler.
  • Purposeful to the story: It should serve the story and help readers make sense of a character’s actions and choices.
  • Tightly conveyed: It should provide just enough information to enhance the story. Too much backstory could turn into an information dump that encourages readers to scan over it.

To ensure you hit the mark, think about which of the following mechanisms might work best for your novel.

1. Drip feed the information

Think of backstory as the seasoning rather than the main dish. It can be tempting to give readers everything you want them to know about the past in a dedicated and detailed chapter. However, this comes with risk. Your reader, who’s itching to move forward and find out what’s going to happen next, is forced backwards.

The focus is no longer on the now of the novel, but on a different time and space. That in itself can be distracting.

Plus, by giving readers all this backstory in one fell swoop, you could lose the opportunity to introduce suspense, mystery or intrigue.

Instead of an information dump, try instead a brief but telling reference that’s related to the current action.
​
For example, if your character’s past involves an event that’s made them mistrustful of small spaces, you could hint at this in the narrative, but explain it more fully in a piece of dialogue later on. Here’s how that might look at first mention. The backstory nudge is in bold.
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​Baz legged it towards the market square but took the long way, avoiding the alley. Too dark. Too small. He’d never make that mistake again, not after last time.
     Ten minutes later he was by the fountain, its mist on his face, the warm glow of festoon lights overhead. He ditched his cap, shook off his jacket and turned it inside out, then melted into the crowd. Just another tourist.
​This way, you’re revealing backstory in smaller chunks – ones that invite the reader to think: What happened last time he went into a dark alley?

​
This builds suspense and leaves readers with questions that you can answer later. And for now, the reader stays in the moment with Baz, running towards the square and finding safety in the crowd.

​2. Use natural dialogue

Dialogue can be a superb way of unveiling backstory. Depending on when it comes up, you can drip feed or go into more detail.
​
The key is to ensure that it sounds natural rather than being a convenient tool. For example, if Marcus already knows about Baz’s fears, the following will feel overworked. The dialogue is for the reader’s benefit only, not what these two people might actually say to each other.

What to avoid
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‘You’re late,’ Marcus said, tapping his watch. ‘I was expecting you five minutes ago.’
     ‘I came the long way,’ Baz said. ‘After that incident in November 2024 where I was left for dead in a dark alleyway, I’ve not felt able to take the risk.’
     Marcus nodded. ‘Yes, I remember the doctor saying you might not make it, that the seventy-three stiches in your head were only a surface indication of the trauma beneath. And your recovery took ... remind me how long it was.’
     ‘Seven months,’ Baz said.
This kind of dialogue-for-convenience is sometimes referred to as maid-and-butler dialogue. To avoid it, try something like the following instead.

What to do instead
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‘You’re late,’ Marcus said, tapping his watch. ‘I was expecting you five minutes ago.’
     ‘I came the long way,’ Baz said. ‘Avoided the alley. After, you know, last time, I couldn’t bear—’
     ‘You need to find a way past that, mate. Let bygones be bygones. I get it, but all you’re doing is turning one risk into another.’
​Again, this version hints at a traumatic event in the past, but leaves an intriguing space for more to be revealed later.

3. Interject with narrative reflection

If the time has come to reveal more, you could use the space between the dialogue to offer a little more insight.

​Take care to restrain it. Give the reader just enough, then pull them back to the present action. Here’s how that might look.
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‘You’re late,’ Marcus said, tapping his watch. ‘I was expecting you five minutes ago.’
     ‘I came the long way,’ Baz said. ‘Avoided the alley. After, you know, last time, I couldn’t bear—’
     ‘Yeah yeah. Look, you need to find a way past that, mate. I get it, but all that’s doing is turning one risk into another.’
     Easy for Marcus to say. He hadn’t been left for dead, beaten to a pulp, the seventy-three stiches transforming his scalp into something Picasso would have been proud of. Seven months he’d been laid up for. Seven—  
    ‘Hey, earth to Bazza. C’mon. Let’s get a pint. I’ve got a plan.’
    Marcus took him by the elbow and steered him through the crowd. It began to rain. An umbrella snapped open above his head.

​4. Use other characters to reveal backstory

You could decide to hint at a character’s backstory through how others see them. Again, readers should be given only what they need to know, and the reveal should be relevant to the scene.
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Fi touched the screen. ‘So this is our route out. I don’t like it. See here? This alley is tight. No lights. Baz might be on his own, and we both know Baz doesn’t do confined spaces … at least he hasn’t done for the past eighteen months.’
     ‘That’s our route out,’ Marcus said. ‘You and me. Baz is leaving through the front door, in plain sight. I’ve got it all worked out.’ ​
Notice how we’re given a nudge about something in Baz’s past that means alternative arrangements have to be made. These add a little complexity to the plan Fi and Marcus are working on, but there’s space to explore in more detail at a later point.

​If it’s time to introduce that extra detail, an alternative could see Marcus reflecting internally on a plan he’s put together. Here, the backstory is more detailed but it’s still relevant to the present issue that he’s focusing on – planning an escape.
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The obvious route out was the alley. Through the kitchen, into the yard, over the wall, and they’d be gone. Two minutes tops. In theory it was good. In practice it was risky. Not for him and Fi. They were sound. But Baz would need to keep his head in the game. And for the past eighteen months, it hadn’t been. His friend had been ambushed, beaten to a pulp, the seventy-three stiches transforming his scalp into something Picasso would have been proud of. Since then, even the suggestion of a tight, unlit space had him going off on one.
     Back to the drawing board. ​

5. Use sounds, objects or settings as triggers

The external environment can be effective tools with which to introduce backstory. Your protagonist might see, hear or touch something that triggers a memory or an emotion.
​
Here are two examples. Once more, they’re mere nudges that make the reader ask questions, rather than lengthy explanations that risk flattening the prose.
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There was a door to his left. Baz opened it. A narrow flight of wooden steps led downwards. He flicked the switch by the latch. A light flashed on, then fizzled and died. He stepped back and shut the door. Shuddered. Too dark, too tight. Not happening.
     Anyway, Marcus was due in ten minutes. He could investigate.
Picture
Fi ran her hand over the cracked porcelain sink. Same kind they’d had in the safehouse in Rotterdam. Good times. Her, Marcus and Baz. All in it together. All of them with their heads in the game. All of them thinking they were invincible.
     ‘Fi, join me.’ It was Marcus, his muffled voice coming from somewhere beneath her.
     ‘He’s down there,’ Baz said, pointing over his shoulder at a roughly hewn slatted door, slightly ajar. ‘Some sort of cellar, I think.’

Summing up

Backstory is as a tool that gives your crime fiction and its characters emotional depth at any point it’s introduced. If it doesn’t affect how the reader engages with the story in the moment, remove it.

Keep it taut so that the reader remains engrossed in the novel’s present – what the characters are doing/feeling now. Nudges and hints at first mention are often far more suspenseful and intriguing.
​
If backstory is dragging on for multiple paragraphs or even chapters – a within-novel biography – rethink its structure and how you might break it up so that you reveal it gradually. 

Other resources you might like

  • Start Crime Fiction Editing: multimedia course
  • Editing Fiction at Sentence Level: book
  • Fiction editing line craft: books
  • How to Line Edit for Suspense: multimedia course
  • How to Write the Perfect Editorial Report: multimedia course
  • Narrative Distance: multimedia course
  • Resource library
  • Switching to Fiction: multimedia course​

About Louise Harnby

Louise Harnby is a line editor, copyeditor and proofreader who specializes in working with crime, mystery, suspense and thriller writers.

She is an Advanced Professional Member of the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CIEP) and co-hosts The Editing Podcast.

  • Get in touch: Louise Harnby | Crime Fiction & Thriller Editor
  • Connect: X @LouiseHarnby, Facebook and LinkedIn
  • Learn: Books and courses
  • Discover: Resources for authors and editors

0 Comments

6 tips for aspiring indie authors

10/11/2021

0 Comments

 
Here are 6 tips that will help emerging indie authors make informed decisions about their editing and writing process during NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) and beyond.
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1. Understand the different types of editing

Regardless of whether an author’s doing their own editing or working with someone like me, I always advise them to make sure they understand the different levels of editing and the order of play.

The first draft of a book is unlikely to be ready for proofreading. Instead, focus on structure first – so how the story hangs together as a whole.

Next comes stylistic line work that focuses on the flow and rhythm of prose.

Copyediting comes after that. This is the more technical side of the work that looks at consistency and clarity.

Only then is it time for the quality-control stage: proofreading.
​
Writers who want to know more can watch a video, listen to a podcast episode or download a booklet.
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2. Top tools and methods for writers on a budget

To make the most of your budget, focus on the five Cs:
​
  • community
  • content
  • craft books
  • courses
  • conscious language

Community
​Take a look at the Alliance of Independent Authors (ALLi) and the Society of Authors. They’re two fine examples of organizations who are dedicated to supporting writers at different stages of their journey.

Membership includes access to free and affordable paid-for events and resources. But they offer something else that’s incredibly valuable too – a network of like-minded people.

Trying to make your mark in the publishing world can feel overwhelming, so being able to get advice and inspiration from others on the same journey is priceless.


Content
There’s a ton of useful – and free – guidance about the craft of writing online, so it’s worth budget-sensitive writers spending time digging around in the search engines. However, those interested in sentence-level guidance can visit my resource library as a first port of call.

I also recommend The Creative Penn, a superb knowledge bank through which Joanna Penn guides aspiring authors on how to write, how to get their books published and how to make their work visible. I love Joanna’s genuine and approachable teaching style, and how she makes self-publishing accessible to everyone.

​Craft books

Books are the most affordable way I know of accessing high-quality guidance. There are lots – too many to mention here – but I recommend fiction writers start with The Magic of Fiction by Beth Hill because it pays attention to structure and helps writers create a great first draft.

My own Editing Fiction at Sentence Level focuses on line craft that helps writers refine the flow, rhythm, mood, voice and style of their prose.
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For non-fiction writers, Andy Maslen’s Write to Sell is an excellent tool for any content creator who wants to craft a compelling message, something that’s critical for authors when they’re promoting their books.

And Joanna Penn’s How to Write Non-Fiction takes authors step by step through the whole book-creation process – from mindset to marketing and everything else in between.

Courses
Love learning at your own pace? Online courses are an affordable and convenient way to study in a multimedia environment.

There are lots to choose from. For starters, take a look at Joanna Penn’s business-focused author courses, and for craft-based tuition for fiction, try Narrative Distance: A Toolbox for Writers and Editors and Preparing Your Book for Submission, two courses from my own training stable.

The National Writing Centre also offers online training that aims to build authors’ confidence. Some of their courses are even free. The NWC also partners with the University of East Anglia to provide more in-depth premium creative-writing courses that come with tutor support.

Conscious language
Anyone who’s aware of the events surrounding Kate Clanchy’s Some Kids I Taught and What They Taught Me will understand the importance of reviewing their work through the lens of representation.

I’m not for a minute suggesting that a work of fiction or non-fiction has to follow a set of prescribed ‘rules’ about what can or can’t be written, but rather that writing means applying the same mindfulness to the words we put on a page as those that come out of our mouths.

When we write, we’re building a relationship with our readers, even though we don’t know who most of them are. And so consciously considering whether our words are helping or harming is just good human practice – one that means our books function as we intend them to, whether that’s to teach or to entertain.

For authors who want a little more guidance on this, I have a free booklet on inclusive and respectful writing. It doesn’t prescribe, just helps writers make informed decisions.
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​3. Manage your first draft appropriately

The first draft isn’t usually something that should be sent to an editor. More often, the first draft is where the author lays down the story just as it comes.

Once that’s done, put the book away – just let it sit for a while – then revisit it and decide what’s working and what isn’t, what needs refining, amplifying or deleting.
Perhaps follow Sophie Hannah and Jeffery Deaver’s lead and create detailed outlines that help keep you on track even at first-draft stage. You can read more about Hannah’s method in ‘Why and how I plan my novels’.

If you do decide to work with an editor, invest time in finding someone who’s a great fit for you: someone who gets you and is engaged with what you’re doing with your writing.

That person should also be offering the right level of editing (see 1. Understand the different types of editing).

And tell them if you’re nervous about being edited; it’s perfectly normal to feel that way. Just bear in mind that they’re on your side and are working for you, for your book and for your reader!

​4. Understand the difference between style, convention and peevery

I'm sometimes asked: 'What’s your biggest writing pet peeve as an editor?' My answer is: There’s no room for pet peeves in professional editing – or at least there shouldn’t be.

Do I have preferences? I do – everyone does – but that’s all they are and they have no business in the work that editors do for their clients. Our job is to focus on a client’s goals, the world of their story, and the readers who’ll come along for the journey.
​
There are stylistic and grammatical conventions in writing, and a professional editor should understand those and be mindful of them, but editing requires a malleable mindset that respects voice and rhythm as much as anything else.

​It’s about sense and sensibility, not prescriptivism and pedantry.

Listen right here to this collection of episodes from The Editing Podcast on language, grammar and style:

5. Recognize the pros and cons of being your own publisher

The main advantage of being an indie author is that you get to control everything.

The main disadvantage is … you get to control everything!

You’re the publisher as well as the writer, which means you decide which books to write and publish, what the cover will look like, which levels of editorial help to commission, which channels to distribute your book through, what the price will be, what formats the book will be available in, and how your promotion strategy will play out.

That’s a lot of work – work that costs you time and money. Publishers will do some of it for you. Still, that will come at a cost because you’ll be taking a royalty that’s likely lower than the return from selling direct.

Being your own publisher isn’t everyone’s wheelhouse, but for those who want to be in control, there’s never been a better time to wear that hat because of all the technical solutions available to authors.

Any writer can use Amazon. It’s the biggest bookstore on the planet. But you might want to sell direct via your website, too, because that’s your very own shop window.

Platforms like Payhip and BookFunnel have made that possible, and it’s made it easy … not just for you but for your customers too.

And for authors who are not only writing but also teaching about writing, there are multiple platforms that support that too – LearnDash (Wordpress plugin), LearnWorlds and Teachable for example.

6. Take control of cramped and communal work spaces

Having a dedicated work space means you're not shifting two large monitors and a hard drive off the dinner table every evening. For those working from home, having a place where your business ‘lives’ helps you separate writing from family life. 

I realize that everyone’s situation is different, but I hope at least one of the following tips will speak to anyone trying to carve out a dedicated work space.
​
  • Agree boundaries in shared spaces: Decide which part is yours and which is theirs, and respect that.
  • Create boundaries in multifunctional spaces: Some writers have to work in a bedroom, kitchen or living room. If there’s enough space, fence off a corner with a panelled room divider. These can be pricey so an alternative is to install a rail and fashion a curtain from an old duvet cover or sheet.
  • Use mobile desks in cramped spaces: Mobile desks are readily available online and are priced competitively so that even writers on a smaller budget can house a monitor, keyboard, mouse and hard drive. Complement with a storage trolley for your books and stationery. Wheel the whole lot into another room when required!

​Summing up

There’s a lot to think about when you decide to become your own publisher – not just what you write but also who supports you during that process, the ways you’ll invest in developing your craft and how to manage the space in which your books are written.
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You’re not alone. There’s a ton of help available to help you … whatever your budget and whatever subject or genre you’re writing in. These 6 tips barely scratch the surface, but I hope they at least inspire you to take the next steps of your indie-author journey with confidence.

About Louise Harnby

Louise Harnby is a line editor, copyeditor and proofreader who specializes in working with crime, mystery, suspense and thriller writers.

She is an Advanced Professional Member of the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CIEP) and co-hosts The Editing Podcast.

  • Get in touch: Louise Harnby | Crime Fiction & Thriller Editor
  • Connect: X @LouiseHarnby, Facebook and LinkedIn
  • Learn: Books and courses
  • Discover: Resources for authors and editors

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How long should a novel be? Guidance for fiction authors

19/4/2021

1 Comment

 
Here’s why it’s worth paying attention to the length of your novel whether you’re publishing independently or submitting to an agent with the aim of securing a publishing contract.
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​What determines word count?

Guidance on word counts differs according to:

  • type of book
  • target age group
  • genre

The infographic below provides a very rough guide to word counts – lower and upper limits and a midpoint. These align with publishing convention.

And these are conventions rather than rules, which is why the ranges are rather wide for some genres. 
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Economics: Printing costs

Pages cost money. KDP says: ‘Printing costs vary depending on page count and ink type (black ink or color ink). Trim size, bleed settings, and cover finish don’t affect printing cost.’

Bear in mind, however, that your chosen trim size will affect the number of words you or your designer fits on a page and therefore the page count, which in turn will affect printing costs.

It’s therefore worth experimenting with different trim sizes and interior designs if you’re going down the print-on-demand route.

There’ll be an optimal design that offers the desired aesthetic for your budget. Approximate calculations are available via the KDP print cost calculator.

If you’re printing in bulk with your own printer, there might be economies of scale on offer for larger print runs. Talk to the supplier and your formatter about how to keep costs down by tweaking the interior design without impacting on readability.

Economics: Editing costs

Generally, the more words in a book, the more each stage of editing will cost. Line editing 80K words will take perhaps a week longer than line editing 50K words.

​If you’re working with a pro editor, remember to factor your word count into your chosen editor’s fee structure.

Expectations: Audience sweet spots

Readers have expectations. Back when my child was four, I expected the picture books I read for them to be shorter than the thrillers I read to myself.

And I don’t mind digging into 100K words or so for Baldacci because his books are quite detailed. Sue Grafton’s Alphabet mystery series has a different feel to it and I’ve come to expect a quicker read – around the 55–75K-word mark.

And if you're self-publishing, consider this from the IngramSpark blog: ‘With less time available for reading, it makes sense that readers want to get to the last page quicker. The trend for the past few years has been to publish books with less than 200 pages on average, or around 50,000 words’ (Self-publishing Trends 2018–2019).

Expectations: Agents and publishers

Agents want to sell books to publishers, and publishers want to sell books to readers.

​Hitting an industry-standard isn’t about word count in itself. It’s about ensuring that the story is told with enough words, and only enough words so that readers are engaged.

Paying attention to word-count conventions reduces an author’s chances of ending up in a slush pile because there aren't red flags indicating overwriting if the novel is huge, and undeveloped story if the book's shorter than standard.

Why word counts help authors focus on quality

If you’re self-publishing, you’re in control. You might decide your thriller needs to be 130K words. If every word drives the story forward and holds the reader’s attention, great.

When the book's too long
If, however, 20K words are cluttering adverbs and adverbial phrases that could be removed or replaced with stronger verbs, the novel’s length isn’t serving the reader.

Or perhaps there are 30K words of laboured stage direction – detail that describes every mundane movement a character makes to remove themselves from a car, climb a flight of stairs, or move from one room to another. Often, nudges that enable the reader to make sense of space and place are enough.

Readers don’t count words, but they will start skimming over them if the prose isn’t tight. And so even if your first draft has X,000 words, use the revision stage to consider what needs to be removed or tweaked.

When the book's too short
If your novel’s word count is substantially lower than industry conventions, consider what might be missing. There could be structural issues such as a too predictable plot, undeveloped character arcs, or too few obstacles.

There could also be opportunities to show rather than tell a scene so that the narrative distance decreases and the reader is drawn deeper into character experience.

The difference between word count and page count

When it comes to novel length, bear in mind that page counts are affected by design (e.g. trim size, margin size, font size, layout) whereas word counts are determined by story alone.

Pro formatters can adjust the page count of a printed book by tweaking the design, though there are limitations.

No reader will be convinced that they’re holding an 80K-work crime novel just because 50K words are set in a Times New Roman 18.

On the other hand, if you’ve written 100K words aimed at the middle-grade market (8–12 years), you’d be wise to reduce the word count considerably rather than asking your designer to make your book look shorter by squeezing more words on each page!
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Furthermore, when it comes to ebooks, there’s no such thing as a standard page because the reader controls how much text appears on the screen. Ebooks lengths are therefore measured in kilobytes (KB), not pages.

Summing up

It’s a cliché but a good story is as long as it needs to be. Longer novels shouldn’t be longer because they haven’t been edited, and shorter novels shouldn’t be shorter because the story is insufficiently fleshed out.
​
Pay attention to word counts as part of an evaluation process that ensures the words that need to be on the page are on the page, and those that needn’t be there are removed. That way, your story will be in the best shape for your readers.

Related resources for authors

  • Author resources library
  • Blog post: 6 ways to improve your novel right now
  • Blog post and video: Crime fiction subgenres: Where does your novel fit?
  • Book: Editing Fiction at Sentence Level
  • Blog post: Playing with sentence length in crime fiction. Is it time to trim the fat?
  • Book: Making Sense of ‘Show, Don’t Tell’
  • Blog post: Unveiling your characters: Physical description with style
  • Blog post: Using adverbs in fiction writing

1 Comment

Fingerprint forensics for beginner crime-fiction writers

13/5/2019

4 Comments

 
If you’re including fingerprint science in your fiction writing, these tips will help you get the basics right.
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Forensic procedure

Fingerprints are an established part of forensic procedure. If they’re in your novel, you’ll need to think about the science, the degree to which you’ll stay true to reality, and how much detail to include without turning your fiction into a textbook.

Here are 9 tips to get you started.

​1. Know how a fingerprint is formed

In ‘Introduction to Forensic Science’, Penny Haddrill describes fingerprints as follows:
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​On our fingers and toes there are many fine ridges. These ridges form recognisable patterns and are formed during the gestation period of the foetus during pregnancy. Fingerprints are produced from the contact between the ridges present on our fingers and a surface. The transfer is achieved by the deposition of the secretions from our glands associated with the ridges on our skin or by contaminants present on the finger surface.’

​2. Know your terminology

If you’re seeking authenticity, the terminology you use will be determined by where your novel’s investigators are based. If your fiction is set in the UK at least, ‘fingerprint’ and ‘fingermark’ mean different things:

PRINT
A fingerprint refers to what is taken from a known/controlled source. For example, if your suspect is arrested, their fingerprints will be taken by the police using specialist equipment. The prints will be of high quality and include all the ridge detail.

MARK
A fingermark refers to what is taken from an unknown/uncontrolled source. Your investigator might find fingermarks at a crime scene or elsewhere on an object that’s suspected of being related to the crime scene. Fingermarks are the ridge patterns (either full or partial, and from one digit or several) left behind on surfaces. The marks will usually be of lower quality, and might be smudged or otherwise contaminated.

​3. Categorize your fingermarks correctly

In Explore Forensics, Jack Claridge offers three categories of mark (though, again, in your novel’s jurisdiction, these might be referred to as prints):

Impressed marks (visible to the naked eye)
These are found when a person’s finger has been pressed into a malleable substance such as wax, clay, or wet paint. They’re sometimes referred to as plastic marks.

Patent marks (visible to the naked eye)
These are found on a surface that’s come into contact with a finger on which there is a residue of, say, blood, oil, dirt, or some other liquid or powder material.

Latent marks (invisible to the naked eye)
The skin secretes sweat from pores. Sweat mixes with external particles in the air, and the body’s natural oils, and sits on the ridges of the fingers. When those fingers come into contact with a surface (particularly something hard or shiny, such as glass) the ridges leave a fingermark that can be exposed under high-intensity light sources or displayed by dusting with a fine powder or chemicals.

​4. Understand where the science wobbles  

It is believed that no two fingerprints are alike but there is no empirical evidence to prove this.

While it’s true that, to date, identical fingerprint matches have not been found, there are enough similar ‘matching points’ between two people’s prints such that false positives and negatives have occurred.

Says Laura Spinney in Nature:
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​Fingerprint analysis is fundamentally subjective. Examiners often have to work with incomplete or distorted prints — where a finger slid across a surface, for example — and they have to select the relevant features from what is available. What is judged relevant therefore changes from case to case and examiner to examiner.
​You might want to bear this in mind when your characters are doing or talking about fingerprint uniqueness.

​5. Get the twin stuff right

Identical twins have almost identical DNA because they develop from one zygote (created by one egg and one sperm) that splits into two embryos.
​

Fingerprints, however, are formed during foetal development. Here's Spinney again:
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​The ridges and furrows on any given fingertip develop in the womb, [and are] shaped by such a complex combination of genetic and environmental factors that not even identical twins share prints.
​With that in mind, don’t make the mistake of hanging your plot on murderous monozygotic mayhem created by a couple of trickster twins. Their DNA might be an almost perfect match, but their paw prints won’t be.

​6. Acknowledge real-world procedure and bias

The Centre for Forensic Science identifies four separate stages in the methodology of fingermark collection: ACE-V.
  • Analysis – all the features of the mark, including any distortions, are analysed by the examiner. Remember, the mark may well be of lower quality than an exemplar fingerprint because it’s smudged or partial or has been contaminated in some way. Marks are analysed in terms of their overall pattern (e.g. loop, regular arch, tented arch, whorl), their ridge characteristics (more detailed ‘minutiae’), and the size, shape and frequency of pores and ridge edges.
  • Comparison – the features are compared with a fingerprint in the database.
  • Evaluation – the examiner decides whether there’s a match. It might be impossible to conclude either way because a comparison can’t be carried out between a partial mark and a full print.
  • Verification – more than one specialist examiner should verify the match.

​In Forensics, Val McDermid discusses a miscarriage of justice that occurred because of flawed procedure (pp. 134–7). A partial fingermark left at the scene of a horrific bombing in Madrid in 2004 was analysed in comparison with a suspect’s fingerprints.

​In other words, the A and C were not separate procedures. The examiner went looking for points of similarity rather than taking into account the differences, even though only a partial fingermark was available. This introduced unacceptable bias and led to erroneous findings. She summarizes the FBI’s later conclusions:
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First of all the expert should analyse the mark in detail, describing as many minutiae as she can. Only afterwards should she examine possible matches and carry out a comparison. When analysis and comparison happen simultaneously, experts run the risk of finding matching minutiae [ridge characteristics) because they are looking for them.
Does this mean you can’t have flawed procedure in your novel? Not at all – it could be a great plot point.

Just bear in mind that the issue of bias is on the agenda for the forensics community internationally. Read ‘A Review of the FBI’s Handling of the Brandon Mayfield Case’ in its entirety if you want more insights into the challenges of fingerprint forensics.

Furthermore, many police forces are having to endure budget cuts. Stretched resources can lead to corner-cutting. How might that affect your story?

​7. Familiarize yourself with processing and enhancement

Latent fingermarks are currently processed using the following techniques. To find out more, read Dr Chris Lennard’s paper, ‘The detection and enhancement of latent fingerprints’, presented at the 13th INTERPOL Forensic Science Symposium.

  • Powder suspension – enhances latent marks on non-porous surfaces. A suspension of coloured metal and detergent is painted onto the surface, then washed off, leaving the fingermark exposed. The mark is photographed.
  • Powders – enhances latent marks on non-porous surfaces. Coloured metal powder – aluminium for glass; black powder for UPVC – is brushed onto the surface, exposing the mark. The mark is photographed or lifted using tape.
  • Cyanoacrylate – enhances latent marks on non-porous surfaces. This compound is found in superglue. The vapour reacts with some marks, producing white crystals on the mark’s ridges. The crystalline can be dyed or dusted with dark powder to further enhance the mark. The mark is then photographed.
  • Ninhydrin – enhances latent marks on porous surfaces. The surface is covered with the chemical then baked. It reacts with amino acids in the finger mark and turns purple. The mark is photographed.

Exemplar fingerprints – those taken directly from an individual in controlled circumstances – are captured via two methods:

  • Ink-rolling (called Tenprints in the UK) – the fingertips and palms are rolled in ink and re-rolled onto card, then photographed.
  • Scanning (called Livescan in the UK and US) – the fingertips and palms are scanned electronically.

Read about how two law-enforcement organizations – one in the UK and one in the US – use ink and scanning technology here:
​
  • FBI: Recording legible fingerprints
  • Northumbria Police: Tenprints

​​8. Use recognized fingerprint databases

​Images of fingermarks extracted from a crime scene can be uploaded to databases containing both fingerprints (and other biometrics) of known individuals and fingermarks that have yet to be identified.

The main fingerprint databases are:
​
  • UK: IDENT1
  • US: IAFIS – Integrated Automated Fingerprint Identification System
  • Australia: National Automated Fingerprint Identification System
  • Eurodac – specifically for identifying asylum seekers and illegal immigrants
  • INTERPOL fingerprints database

​9. Decide how far to bend the rules

Do you need to worry about any of this? After all, it’s fiction!

​It depends on the subgenre of your writing, and how your readers are likely to respond to deviations from reality. If your novel is set in an alternative world or in the future, you can play it however you want.


If, however, you’re writing a realistic procedural, you could alienate sticklers if you get it wrong, especially those who are police officers, forensic scientists, scene-of-crime officers, and fingerprint examiners.

TV shows like Silent Witness and CSI offer audiences a single viewpoint. Most viewers accept that the real world involves more complex investigations with many more players. Books, like TV shows, entertain us, so readers too will indulge writers who bend the rules to a degree.

Even if you don’t want to go for maximum authenticity, consider sprinkling your narrative with factual information that grounds your investigation just enough to head off those whose fingers are hovering over the one-star button in Amazon’s review pane!

​Further reading and related resources

  • 3 reasons to use free indirect speech in crime fiction​
  • A Review of the FBI’s Handling of the Brandon Mayfield Case, US Department of Justice, 2006
  • Crime writing resources for indie authors
  • Fingerprint Examination – Terminology, Definitions and Acronyms, Forensic Science Regulator, 2013
  • Forensics: The Anatomy of Crime, by Val McDermid. Wellcome Collection, 2015
  • Introduction to Forensic Science (online course), with Penny Haddrill, Centre for Forensic Science, University of Strathclyde, 2018
  • Latent Prints, by Jack Claridge. Explore Forensics, 2017
  • Playing with sentence length in crime fiction. Is it time to trim the fat?
  • ​Playing with the rhythm of fiction: commas and conjunctions
  • Science in court: The fine print, by Laura Spinney. Nature 464, 344–6, 2010
  • The Detection and Enhancement of Latent Fingerprints, presented at the 13th INTERPOL Forensic Science Symposium, by Dr Chris Lennard, 2001
  • Why ‘suddenly’ can spoil your crime fiction: Advice for new writers

​About Louise Harnby

Louise Harnby is a line editor, copyeditor and proofreader who specializes in working with crime, mystery, suspense and thriller writers.

She is an Advanced Professional Member of the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CIEP) and co-hosts The Editing Podcast.

  • Get in touch: Louise Harnby | Crime Fiction & Thriller Editor
  • Connect: X @LouiseHarnby, Facebook and LinkedIn
  • Learn: Books and courses
  • Discover: Resources for authors and editors

4 Comments

How to write novels for readers, not viewers

26/11/2018

11 Comments

 
Novels and screenplays are two very different art forms. When a story is presented to a reader as if it were something being watched in a cinema or on TV, the book begins to wobble.
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Great screenwriters can be great novelists, but being the former doesn’t guarantee the latter.

Description and dialogue

When a novelist approaches their story as if it’s going to be watched, the narrative and dialogue can become overwritten.

In TV shows and movies, characters do lots of quite mundane things – walking into and out of rooms, opening and shutting doors, scratching their heads, putting the kettle on, wringing their hands, frowning, standing up, sitting down, walking over to windows and gazing out of them, picking up tea cups or beer bottles and taking a sip or a slug.

They say hello and goodbye, and hmm, mmm, er, um and aah as they talk to each other and themselves.

All this stuff happens quickly and provides a backdrop to the main action and dialogue. Sometimes there’ll be a backing track to assist with mood creation.

Some of that mundane stuff can go into a novel, but when it’s replicated in full it can be tedious to read and does nothing to drive the novel forward.

Example: taut description and dialogue in a novel
Here’s a scene from Harlan Coben’s Don’t Let Go (Penguin Random House, 2017, p. 201). There are 122 words.
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We pull into a garage the approximate dimensions of a college gymnasium—is that judging?—and park. He leads me through a side door and down into what some homes call a basement, but this one has a theater room and wine cellar, so we need to find a new term. Lower level, maybe? He heads into a small room and flicks on a switch. In the back right corner, there is a four-foot-high old-fashioned safe with a big dial.
     “You’re not the cop on the case, right?”
     This is the third time David has asked me that. “No. Why is that a big deal?”
     He bends down and starts fiddling with the dial. “Hank asked me to hold something for him.”

Example: description and dialogue in a screenplay
If we were watching that on TV, we’d be shown a great deal more.​
  • We’d the see colour of the garage, the material it’s constructed from, the car pulling up and stopping.
  • The driver would switch off the engine, then both men would undo their seatbelts, exit the car, close their doors and walk to the garage. One would open the side door and they’d both walk through as the door closed behind them. Then they’d walk down the steps, reach the door of the basement and open it.
  • Once in the room, David would flick the light switch, walk over to the safe, bend down, move the dial, left, then right, then left again.
  • The camera might flip from the concentration on his face and the beads of sweat on his forehead to the way his trousers pull down over his backside as he bends.
  • We might watch and hear his laboured breathing or the slight grunt he lets out as he works.
  • He might scratch his face, touch his hair, purse his lips, or look up at the other man (Nap).
  • Nap, meanwhile, would be doing a bunch of things with his own body.
  • As for the conversation, either man might sigh, pause, stammer, belch or cough at any point, and at no time would it moderate the pace of the film because the camera can show us many of these things simultaneously.

In his book, Coben omits almost all of that.

Instead, he lets the reader do the work. Good choice because all that stage direction would be boring to read. It could take a page to get through it all, maybe two, and none of it would drive the novel forward.

He gives us just enough to imagine the setting in our mind’s eye, then gets down to business with the interesting elements of the story.

He and we know that no one’s walking through doors spectre-like; they need to be opened and shut. No one’s leaving the car running; the engine will be switched off. And natural speech invariably includes noise and pause.

Example: overwriting in a novel
Here’s my mangled example of how that might have looked if the detail of the screen version had been written into the novel. There are 421 words.
Word dump
Writers who choose to write novels for viewers rather than readers risk adding ten, maybe twenty thousand words to their books that don’t need to be in there.

I’m not advocating removing description; I’m advocating writing for the page. That means making sure that the description is relevant rather than suffocating, enriching rather than boring.

If you have pages of characters making small talk about how they take their coffee over the noise the kettle’s making, that small talk needs to be central to the plot. So does the whistle of the kettle. And if it takes 500 words to get your character out of their car, there needs to be a reason for that.

If that information is just filler, give your reader the nudges they need and dump the rest into a box for when you write the screenplay version. Your director will the delighted! ​
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We drive along the road, turn left into a treelined side street, pull up in front of a garage the approximate dimensions of a college gymnasium—is that judging?—and park. The garage door has a red aluminum facia with a silver handle.
     David pushes a hand through his hair and looks at the garage. He remains still for a moment. I sense his anxiety, and my brow furrows in frustration as I follow his gaze.
     He takes his foot off the accelerator, shifts into neutral, and pulls on the handbrake. He pulls the key from the ignition and unhooks his seatbelt. I follow suit and open the passenger-seat door, close it, then walk around to meet him on the driver’s side. David gets out of the car and joins me on the sidewalk. He slams his door shut and turns. We walk toward the garage, me slightly behind, letting him show me the way.
     He leads me to a brown hardwood side door and stoops, fumbling the key in the lock. The door opens with a groan and we walk through to a dimly lit stairway. The door closes behind us. David goes first, leading me down into what some homes call a basement, but this one has a theater room and wine cellar, so we need to find a new term. Lower level, maybe?
     We reach the door at the bottom of the steps. David opens it and heads into a small room. He flicks on a switch. The light comes on and he turns, gesturing for me to enter. I do, and look around. In the back right corner, there is a four-foot-high old-fashioned safe with a big dial.
     “Um, you’re, er, not the cop on the case, right?” he says nervously.
     This is the third time David has asked me that. “Like I told you before, no.” I hesitate before asking, “Why is that a big deal?”
     He turns and walks toward the safe, bends down, and reaches for the dial with his hand. I watch as he fiddles with it, concentrating hard as he moves it first left, then right, then left again. I see sweat beading on his forehead. He stands, stretches, and wipes it off with the sleeve of his blue button-down shirt. As he lowers himself again and continues working the dial, his pants ride down over his ass.
     ​He sighs as if he’s bearing the weight of the world on his shoulders. “Hank asked me to hold something for him,” he says.

Viewpoint characters

Viewpoint can unravel when a novelist approaches their story like a screenwriter.

When a novelist selects a viewpoint character for a section or chapter of their book, the reader will experience the story through that character’s perspective – what they see, smell, hear, touch and think.

Viewpoint characters allow the reader to immerse themselves in the moment, and for that reason they’re tremendously enriching.

Example: viewpoint on the screen 
Imagine watching this short scene on TV:
  1. One of the characters, Matt, ducks under a hedge. We see him grimacing, shutting his eyes tightly. Then the camera cuts to a close-up of the thorns in the hedge pressing into his head. Perhaps there’s a trickle of blood down one side of his neck.
  2. The camera stays with Matt and we see him mouth the word ‘bitch’.
  3. We hear the clip-clopping of heels, and the camera moves to a lone woman on a footpath in the garden – Adriana. She speaks into her phone, saying, ‘He can’t have gone far. Find him and take him out,’ then rubs her throat. She continues to talk, telling the person on the other end of the line that she’d had a skinful the previous night and is furious about Matt’s interference, which is all she needs because she feels like she has a cold coming on.
  4. The camera cuts to another character, John. He’s clad in black. We hear him reply to her, telling her not to worry, then watch as he peeks over a wall and sees Adriana.
  5. The view shifts to Adriana. She’s putting her phone in her pocket. Her expression is one of anger and frustration.
  6. We go back to John. He pulls down a balaclava and moves stealthily towards an area at the back of the house. He’s almost invisible in the darkness of the night but we see him in the shadows because the camera shows us where he is.
  7. Now it’s back to Matt. He’s still hunched up in the hedge, eyes wide, body still.
  8. The camera zooms out so that we can see Adriana moving ever closer to where Matt’s hiding. She’s getting nearer.
  9. The view moves in on Adriana. We see her flinch and purse her lips. She hobbles just a little, then bends to adjust her shoe. The camera view tilts down to her feet and we see the redness of the skin where it’s rubbing against her stilettos.
  10. The camera cuts to Matt, still in the hedge. But now he’s smiling, enjoying Adriana’s discomfort.
  11. Notice that the viewer can’t know what anyone’s thinking unless we are told through dialogue or facial expression. Gesturing will fill in the gaps. A soundtrack will also create mood.

Example: confused viewpoint in a novel
What some beginner writers do is render the scene in a way that partially mimics the screen version. That’s because they’re familiar with how stories are presented on the TV or in film.
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Matt ducked under the hedge beside the footpath. He counted silently, mouthing the words, focusing attention away from the hawthorn piercing the back of his neck and scalp. Heels clicked on the footpath close by. Adriana. Bitch.
     ‘He can’t have gone far. Find him and take him out,’ she said. Her throat felt swollen. 'Dammit, and to make things worse, I feel like I've got a cold coming on. Plus, I had a skinful last night.' And she’d needed it after that interfering prick Matt had started sticking his nose where it wasn’t wanted.
     ‘I hear you, Adriana. Don’t worry, we’ll find him,’ said John. He was standing by the north wall, clad head-to-toe in black. Hands grasping brick and flint, he hauled himself up and peeked over to see Adriana pocketing her phone. He pulled down his balaclava and stole south to cover the back, masked by the shadow of night.
     Adriana was on the phone, Matt realized. That was good. It meant she was on her own.
     Adriana continued down the path, getting closer to where Matt was hiding with every step. Patrolling the grounds in stilettos had been a bad idea. They were killing her feet.
​     Matt hoped so, after what she’d put him through.
The problem is that there are multiple viewpoints that force the reader to bounce from one character’s experience to another. We never invest in Matt, Adriana or John because as soon as we try to immerse ourselves in the experience of one of those people, we’re dragged into the head of another.

The result is a wonky hybrid of novel and screenplay. We know what everyone’s doing, thinking and seeing. It rips out the tension and destroys the structure of the scene.

Example: singular immersive viewpoint in a novel
If, however, the writer commits to the viewpoint of one character, the prose is very different. In this version, we lose John completely. Adriana is visible but only from Matt’s perspective. We don’t have access to her thoughts, only what Matt thinks might be going on in her head based on what he knows, sees and hears.
​
It’s shorter, certainly, but the tension is back and the writing is tighter.
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Matt ducked under the hedge beside the footpath. He counted silently, focusing attention away from the hawthorn piercing the back of his neck and scalp. Heels clicked on the footpath close by. Adriana. Bitch.
     
‘He can’t have gone far. Find him and take him out.’
     
Her voice was thick, like she was full of virus or hungover. Or maybe it was fury.
     Matt heard a reply – a man speaking – but the sound was muffled and tinny.
     She must be on the phone. That was good. She was on her own. For now.

     ​Patent-black stilettos passed no more than a metre in front of him. The skin below both Achilles looked swollen and red. Those shoes must be killing her, he thought. He hoped so, after what she’d put him through.

Summing up

If you’re at the start of your writing journey, take care to craft words for the page, not for the screen. Keep the boring stuff out, even if it’s realistic. You’ll reduce your wordcount but enhance reader engagement.
​
Look to books written by your favourite novelists for inspiration on how to build a beautiful page, rather than the Netflix adaptations. Your writing will be all the better for it, I promise.

About Louise Harnby

Louise Harnby is a line editor, copyeditor and proofreader who specializes in working with crime, mystery, suspense and thriller writers.
​

She is an Advanced Professional Member of the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CIEP) and co-hosts The Editing Podcast.

  • Get in touch: Louise Harnby | Crime Fiction & Thriller Editor
  • Connect: X @LouiseHarnby, Facebook and LinkedIn
  • Learn: Books and courses
  • Discover: Resources for authors and editors

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World-building compendiums for crime writers

12/11/2018

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Will your reader immerse themselves in your crime novel’s setting? Will the world you’ve built make sense, even if it’s a work of fantasy? And is it coherent? If you’re not sure, create a compendium.
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What is a world-building compendium?

A world-building compendium ​is a concise collection of information, gathered into one place, that will help you keep track of your novel’s environment and the rules that govern it. And that will go some way to protecting your plot and maintaining a logical narrative.

‘But I write crime, not fantasy ...’

Even if your novel’s setting is the world as we know it right now, a world-building compendium is still useful.

I used to live in a small village in Norfolk (the UK one). Some of the things I had to deal with in my day-to-day life were different to those of friends who live only ten miles away in the city of Norwich.
For example, they’re connected to mains drainage. I, however, had to book the honey pot man to come and empty the septic tank once a year! Normal for me; weird for others.

And then there’s my local pal. He has the same drainage issues, but his working day is very different to mine. He’s a police officer. His work takes him directly into situations that I’m familiar with only at a distance, through the crime fiction I edit and the shows I watch on TV.
How does all of this relate to fiction writing?

​One of my author clients bases his books in the Colorado Rockies. I know the lie of the land – how the weather affects the local population on a seasonal basis, how the pine smells in the spring, how the mountain passes are treacherous in the winter.

Then there’s the town where the sheriff’s office is located. And it is a sheriff rather than a chief constable who’s in charge of this fictional county’s law enforcement. I know about the guns people carry, the idiomatic turns of phrase they use, and where they tuck their chewing tobacco when they speak.

I live five thousand miles away and have never visited this region of the US, and yet I swear if I drove into that town with a flat tyre, I could locate the garage and a find place to grab a latte while the mechanic was fixing my car – without having to ask a soul.

And that’s because my author is a great world-builder.
​
He writes crime thrillers, but he never forgets that most of his readers aren’t cops; that many don’t even live in the US, never mind near the Colorado Rockies; and that no one lives in Rocky Points … because he made it up.

Environments of the not-now and the not-here

Crime fiction is as versatile a genre as any other. For not-here, think about Chris Brookmyre’s Places in the Darkness. The Ciudad de Cielo space station makes the Colorado Rockies seem like a mere hop. It’s crime fiction, but spacey!

For not-now, how about C. J. Sansom’s Shardlake series. It’s crime fiction but the Tudor world in which our lawyer-detective operates bears little resemblance to that of a modern detective.

And then there’s China Miéville’s not-here and not-now The City & The City. It’s a richly gritty world of hardboiled crime fiction where things don’t work in quite the same way. However, the narrative feels utterly reliable.

All three authors are fine crime-writing world-builders, and their plots never unravel because the worlds they’ve shown us work.

Your compendium and your plot

Not everything in your compendium has to end up in your book, but all of the information will help you keep track of who’s who, what’s where, and how. That means you can keep the environment(s) in which your story is set coherent.

Furthermore, if you decide to write a series, your compendium will help you maintain consistency across books. Even if you switch to a new location, even a new planet, and different rules come into play, it’s a space in which you can record the additional information and keep yourself on track.

Let’s look at some of the elements you might include in your crime compendium.

Physical environment

Where does your story take place and how will the geography, geology and climate play with your plot? Does the landscape or the weather restrict or empower your characters, and if so, how?

Real or fantastical, every world must obey its own scientific laws. Continuity is key, and your compendium will help you stay on track.

Imagine your protagonist’s partner dies because the paramedic’s oxygen tank is empty, but they live on a world where the population breathes mainly nitrogen. Even your characters’ inhalations can blow a hole in your plot if you don’t keep track of the rules of your physical environment.
​
If you’re setting a story in a real place that you’ve not visited, the compendium ​is where you record the details you’ll need to stop pedantic locals getting the hump when your hero sprints from the Tube station at Amersham to the next stop on the line. Chalfont & Latimer looks close by on the London Underground map, but trust me, it’s not for sprinting. Embankment to Charing Cross, yes!

Culture, language and faith

Use your compendium to record the ideas, customs, belief systems and social behaviours that distinguish your world, and how those will impact on your characters. Record also how your characters speak, and whether they are out of place in the setting, or fully integrated.
Consider how historical cosy crime narratives find clever ways to enable characters who are restricted by socio-economic or gender disparities typical of the eras they’re set in.

A good example is Emily Brightwell’s Mrs Jeffries. She’s a Victorian housekeeper who nimbly engineers a higher quality of detection than her boss, the hapless Inspector Witherspoon, would be capable of without the help of his domestic staff.

​How will you reflect the way people speak in your world? Do people from the region in which the novel’s set have a particular idiom or dialect, and will you express this just through dialogue or in the narrative too?


Will you offer nudges here and there or include it consistently and heavily throughout the book?
​
It goes without saying that if you include phrasing in a language you’re not fluent in, get it checked by someone who is. Google Translate is not the tool of choice here.

Rules of governance

Record who’s in control and how the rule of law works in your novel’s setting. If you’re mimicking reality, there might be variations not just between countries but also between states, counties, provinces or municipalities.

Who makes the law? Who upholds it? What powers do they have? What are their titles? Who are they accountable to? What are the checks and balances that restrict them? And what does sentencing and punishment look like in the world you’ve created?

How about the rules of engagement and the customary notifications given to characters apprehended by law enforcement? If a right-to-silence warning is given to a suspect arrested in the UK, and it’s referred to as a Miranda warning, your narrator’s reliability will be compromised. The term ‘caution’ is used in this neck of the woods.

Make notes about the way the jurisprudence system works, and the rights of your world’s citizens in the locations you situate them. For example, time and place will determine how long a person can be held without access to legal representation, and how they might be punished if they’re found guilty of a crime.

If your story is taking place in a fantastical setting, you can decide how all of this works. Still, your compendium will ensure there’s continuity in the way you apply your fictional rule of law to your characters.

Science, technology, engineering and medicine ... and guns

Your compendium ​is the perfect place to record essential information about science, tech and weaponry – what it is, how it works, who has access to it and what it’s used for.

If you’re going for authenticity, make notes about how it works in the real world. How heavy is a Glock 19, and can a suppressor be attached to the barrel? What noise does a suppressed gun really make – is it just a pop or something louder?

Years ago, I read a novel by a very well-known fantasy and horror writer. One of the subplots hinged on the DNA of a set of identical twins – one egg, one sperm, one zygote, which had split into two embryos. They had almost identical DNA. Only they didn’t because our twins were different sexes. That meant they were fraternal, not identical. The only thing they’d shared was a womb. A technical error pulled the plot to pieces.

Food, drink and dress

What do people eat and drink in this world, and how do they dress?

Are there foodstuffs or materials that are restricted, impractical, unaffordable or impossible to access for some or all of the characters in your world?

Does what people eat and how they dress indicate something about their status, their identity, their belief system, and what are the norms and rules surrounding their choices?

Even if this information isn’t integral to the plot, it can still help your reader immerse themselves in your narrative as they experience the colours, textures, tastes and smells of the world in which your characters are moving.

Heterogeneity in homogeneity

As with real life, just because a group of people share a location, a job, a faith, doesn’t mean they’re all the same.

Unless homogeneity is central to the plot, it can suck the soul from a novel because it’s unusual.
Michael J. Sullivan’s Hollow World is a mystery thriller set in the future where a person’s physical appearance is determined by their job. That doesn’t stop him looking for ways to distinguish the identities of his worker groups – through belief systems, styles of dress, hobbies and passions, even the way they move and smile.
​
Use your compendium ​to record which differences and similarities make sense in your world, and how you will reflect them.

Other quirks

Record information about any other quirks that are story-specific in a miscellaneous section.

I nearly came undone with my own writing when embarking on a piece of flash fiction centred around where I live in Norfolk. During my research into pheasant shooting, I found out that my wee tale had come undone before I’d put a word on the page.

Initially, I’d centred my plot around a crime being ignored during the summer because of the gunshots from legal pheasant-shooting parties. ​
Turned out this would have been impossible because the law in England prohibits shoots of that specific bird during the summertime.

Still, better that I made my discovery early on. Fixing it later would have required rewriting. The information I gleaned from my research would have gone straight into a compendium ​if I’d been writing an 80K-word novel rather than 800 words of flash.

Summing up

You can include whatever you need to in your compendium. Fundamentally, it’s about consistency and continuity, such that your plot isn’t plundered because you forgot something crucial about your world and how it works.
​
More than that though, a reliable world is a believable world, even if it’s completely fabricated. When your readers feel like they can visit without having to ask where to grab a cuppa, you know you’ve built something beautiful.

About Louise Harnby

Louise Harnby is a line editor, copyeditor and proofreader who specializes in working with crime, mystery, suspense and thriller writers.
​

She is an Advanced Professional Member of the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CIEP) and co-hosts The Editing Podcast.

  • Get in touch: Louise Harnby | Crime Fiction & Thriller Editor
  • Connect: X @LouiseHarnby, Facebook and LinkedIn
  • Learn: Books and courses
  • Discover: Resources for authors and editors

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What is flash fiction and what can it teach us?

24/9/2018

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What is flash fiction and can its creation make us better writers and better editors?

​In July 2018, I wrote my first piece of flash fiction and submitted it to the Noirwich Crime Writing Festival’s flash fiction competition. Here’s what I learned.
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​What is flash fiction?

Think of a tiny story that packs a large wallop … that’s flash fiction. It’s not always called that. Some call it micro fiction, others nano fiction. I’ve also heard it called the shortie, short-short and postcard fiction.

How long is it? There’s no consensus other than it’s short ... very short. Some types of flash fiction have established word counts – the dribble with 50 words, the drabble with 100 words, and Twitterature – ­­no more than 280 characters. If Twitterature seems like a challenge, imagine writing it when the character-count limitation was 140!

So what are the key components and what can they teach writers of longer-form fiction?

​1. Brevity – making every word count

Keeping things tight is one of the biggest challenges faced by many of the beginner novelists I work with.

Overwriting usually occurs because the author hasn’t yet learned to trust their reader. Will that single adjective be enough? Maybe another sentence that says a similar thing would be in order, just for clarification …

Often, it’s not a reflection of a writer’s ability to write, but about confidence. Getting the balance right comes with experience and not a little courage. A line editor can help with overwriting – they bring fresh eyes to the book, and can advise on what can safely be removed without damaging flow, sense, rhythm and tension, and in a way that respects style and voice.

Flash fiction helps writers practise the art of precision in the extreme. And when it comes to self-editing your novel, you can ask yourself this: ‘If this were a short story and my word count was restricted, is this the way I’d construct this sentence?’

The answer might be ‘No, but I’d be missing an opportunity to enrich the narrative and the dialogue in a way that’s best for my book.’ That’s a great answer. Still, the flash fiction writer is forced to be disciplined, and when it comes to writing longer works, that discipline will get you used to thinking in terms of making sure every word counts, and comfortable with removing those that don’t.

A limited word count also encourages writers to experiment with literary devices such as free indirect speech, sentence fragments, action beats, and asyndeton, all of which can facilitate brevity but enrich tension, immediacy, mood and rhythm. 

2. Structure – shaping the story

Stories need structure. No writer wants to get to the end of their novel only to realize that the denouement occurred ten chapters earlier. Sophie Hannah calls it ‘story architecture’, which I think is both a practical and a beautiful way of thinking about how a writer helps their readers experience a novel.

There are different ways to shape stories but the most common is the three-act structure. First, the beginning or hook that draws us in. Second, the middle where the confrontation takes place. This is where we come to understand the characters’ motivations and the conflict or obstacles in their way. Third, is the end where the denouement or resolution occurs.

Says Julia Crouch, ‘If you have any storytelling bones in you at all, you will more than likely, even subconsciously, end up with a structure like this.’

How does flash fiction help? Do you even need to worry about structure when you’re writing such a short piece of work?

Absolutely! No one will enjoy an 80,000-word novel that’s poorly structured. The same applies to 800 words. The only difference is that with flash fiction they’ll lose interest quicker.

Flash fiction is a story form in its own right. It’s not about pulling an excerpt from a longer-form piece of writing. Flash must have structure – a beginning, a middle and an end. Something must happen to someone or something, and readers must leave the story feeling satisfied, that the story is complete, that they’ve been on a journey, albeit a short one.

Without structure, it will descend into nothing more than an extract.

Perhaps flash is akin to poetry – squeezing big ideas into small spaces. That too, though, is good practice for the novelist, because it encourages writers to think about the discipline of shaping, and the journey that the reader will be taken on.

3. Strong endings – surprises and twists

There’s nothing more disappointing than a book that hooks you into turning page after page only to sag into a giant anti-climax.

‘Endings are so important to the reader and you will never please everyone,’ says Nicola Morgan. ‘Readers do want the end to feel “right”, though. They have spent time with these characters and they care what happens to them.’

How and when novelists decide to tie up all or most of the loose ends will depend on style, genre, and whether the book is part of a series, but there must be some sort of closure so that your readers aren’t left hanging.

Flash fiction is a challenge to write, but it’s a challenge to read too, particularly for those who love to get stuck into a world and the characters who move around within it.

It’s therefore an excellent format in which to practice packing a final punch, even if that amounts to just one or two sentences. This form of writing also allows writers to play with readers’ expectations of resolution in quirky ways.

You might decide to evoke a laugh, or a shudder, or shock, or a sense of poignancy, but the reader should feel something such that even though you’ve only written a few hundred words the story is memorable.

Below are some additional tips that you might consider if writing flash fiction appeals.

Flash fiction tip #1: Seek immediacy

Consider your choice of tense.

At the time of writing, I’ve written eight flash fiction stories, none of more than 900 words. In all but two I instinctively opted for the present tense. I didn’t notice my predilection until I reread them one after the other. It made me reconsider the two I’d framed in the past tense. I decided to see what would happen if I changed them.

I learned something. My narrative tension loses its piquancy when I write in the past. That’s not to say I wouldn’t use the past if I were writing a novel. However, for flash fiction, there’s no time to lose! I’m trying to close the distance between the reader and the viewpoint character so that the former is quickly immersed in the tiny world I’ve built.

The opposite might be true for you; there are no rules. But if your flash is flagging, don’t be afraid to experiment with tense and evaluate the impact.

Flash fiction tip #2: Characters and viewpoint

Given the space available, keep the story tight by sticking to one viewpoint character.
It’s easier to create immersion if you allow readers to get under the skin of a single person’s experience. That doesn’t mean there can’t be other characters in the frame, just that we see these others through the viewpoint character’s eyes.

You’ll likely need to omit anything about the character that isn’t necessary to drive the story forward. Novels include descriptions of the characters’ appearance and personality so that we can better visualize them and understand their motivations.
​

With flash, consider focusing only on those unique physical and emotional traits that nudge the reader towards the big reveal.

Flash fiction tip #3: Tap into the mundane

Play the what-if game. Take an object, or place, or personality attribute of someone you know, and ask what the story might be in another universe.

What if that old door in your friend’s hallway didn’t really go to the downstairs loo? What if that scribble you found on the inside of a library book had a more sinister connotation? What if your neighbour wasn’t quite who you believed them to be? What if your best mate’s boring job was just a cover story?

Sometimes the most wonderful clues to the theme of a shortie are hidden in plain sight.

The editor turned fiction writer – lessons learned

Writing and editing are two very different arts. I don’t believe that a good fiction editor must be a fiction writer. I do, however, think we need to understand the core components of fiction writing and what makes a book work, and be able to place ourselves in the shoes of the author and the reader.

Still, I’m (now) one of many fiction editors who also write fiction. Some of my colleagues have publishing contracts. Some are self-publishers. Some have agents, while others are seeking representation. Some of us write our fiction purely for pleasure.

​There are many roads, but we all agree on one thing: it has been good for us to sit on the other side of the desk – to be the writer, to be the one being edited. ​
Louise Harnby reads her flash fiction at Noirwich 2018
Louise reading 'Zeppelin'. Crime writer Elizabeth Haynes looks on.
The short story I wrote for Noirwich 2018 was a challenge for two reasons:

  1. I’ve written non-fiction – several books, materials for online courses, this weekly blog, guest articles for magazines and newsletters, essays during my university days. But I’d not written fiction since I was in high school, and back then I wasn’t being judged on it.
  2. The brief was to write 500 words of crime fiction related to Norwich or Norfolk. The last time I wrote anything with fewer than 500 words was when I constructed the bio on my website!

The amazing thing is that I made the final shortlist of three.

That, however, presented a new challenge. I was invited to Noirwich Live where the winner would be announced by New York Times bestseller Elizabeth Haynes. Would I read my story ‘Zeppelin’ to a roomful of people, mostly complete strangers?

The audience comprised fellow amateur writers, teachers of creative writing, published writers including Haynes, Merle Nygate and Andrew Hook, and most important of all, my daughter Flo and dear friend Rachel.

My knees might have been trembling as I took to the floor, but I got the job done and thought about what I’d learned from the experience.

Sharing takes courage
Writing fiction is one thing; sharing it with others is quite another. Even tiny fiction like mine. For some of us, it takes courage, especially when massive doses of newbie impostor syndrome are flowing through one’s veins.

And this is exactly how many of my author clients feel. Sometimes I’m the first person on the planet to see their work when they’re done with it. My experience enhanced my already deep respect for them, because now I know how it feels to share my fiction with others.

Editing is an honour
My own small venture has taught me what a privilege it is to be chosen by an author to edit for them. When they choose me or one of my colleagues, they take a leap of faith. They place trust in us to treat their words with respect and help them move forward towards their publishing goals.

Fiction is intimate
The nine stories I’ve written to date are really short. I’m at the beginning of my fiction writing journey. I have a lot to learn. But those stories are precious to me. Every one of them contains a bit of me, or of someone I care about, or someone or something that has made a mark on me in some way. They are not fact, but they are not completely made up either, and that infuses them with a level of intimacy.

In other words, fiction writing is personal.

It’s important that the fiction editor takes all of that into their editing studio and remembers it at every touchpoint of the project – an amendment, a query, a summary – and never forgets to say thank you.

​Further reading

  • Julia Crouch. Five tips for keeping your readers gripped. Noirwich. 2018.
  • Louise Harnby. 3 reasons to use free indirect speech in your crime fiction
  • Louise Harnby. Playing with the rhythm of fiction: commas and conjunctions
  • Louise Harnby. Playing with sentence length in crime fiction. Is it time to trim the fat?
  • Louise Harnby. Shorts and Flashes. 2018
  • National Centre for Writing
  • Nicola Morgan. Write to be Published. Snowbooks. 2014
  • Noirwich Crime Writing Festival

About Louise Harnby

Louise Harnby is a line editor, copyeditor and proofreader who specializes in working with crime, mystery, suspense and thriller writers.

She is an Advanced Professional Member of the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CIEP) and co-hosts The Editing Podcast.

  • Get in touch: Louise Harnby | Crime Fiction & Thriller Editor
  • Connect: X @LouiseHarnby, Facebook and LinkedIn
  • Learn: Books and courses
  • Discover: Resources for authors and editors

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Research tools for crime and thriller writers

3/9/2018

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If you’re including authentic technical or procedural information in your crime writing, you’ll be wearing your research hat. Your story should come first, of course. However, be sure to get your facts straight before you decide if and how far you’re going to bend reality.
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Variations in procedure

Procedure varies between region and country, and when your novel is set will also determine the relevance of the resources I’ve included. Still, even those outside your jurisdiction might spark an insight that drives your storyline further or deepens your characterization

​Conversations, consultations and ride-alongs

My brushes with the law have been limited to bad parking. Still, I know a few coppers socially, and it’s to them I’d head for procedural guidance in the first instance.

If you know a police officer, a forensic anthropologist, a crime-scene investigator, a barrister, or whatever, ask them if you can pick their brains. They’ll have expert subject knowledge and insights, and your talking with them face to face could be the most powerful tool of all.

If you don’t have existing contacts, ask your friends for theirs or put a call out on social media. A writer recently requested help from munitions experts via the Alliance of Independent Authors (ALLi) Facebook group. Several commenters provided advice and one offered to put her in touch with an expert.

​If your book's set in the UK, try Consulting Cops or Graham Bartlett, author and crime fiction advisor. Both have teams of law-enforcement experts who'll help you keep your facts straight.

Here’s crime writer Julie Heaberlin discussing the importance of researching and feeling comfortable approaching experts, especially to bring deeper layering to her novels:
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I’m very worried about not being accurate […] because there are a lot of writers who don’t research and that’s just more misinformation out there. And I learn things myself. Standing outside the Texas Death House during an execution … it wasn’t anything like I thought it would be.
How to Write Crime – Harry Brett in conversation with Sophie Hannah and Julia Heaberlin. Waterstones, Norwich, 2018
In a bid to improve relations between the police service and the public, some larger forces now operate ride-along schemes that allow members of the public to patrol with an officer. In the UK, these include Avon & Somerset, Nottinghamshire, Essex, Lincolnshire, Lancashire, Humberside and Warwickshire Police.

Search online using the keywords ‘ride-along police [your country/state/city]’ and see what comes up.

Watch and read

How about TV and movies? Your favourite crime dramas and fiction might have been meticulously researched. Then again, they might not. In ‘Five Rules for Writing Thrillers’ David Morrell urges writers to do the research but to use caution:
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You don’t need to be a physician or an attorney to write a medical thriller or a legal thriller, but it sure helps if you’ve been inside an emergency ward or a courtroom. Read non-fiction books about your topic. Interview experts. If characters shoot guns in your novel, it’s essential to fire one and realize how loud a shot can be. Plus, the smell of burned gunpowder lingers on your hands.

​Don’t rely on movies and television dramas for your research. Details in them are notoriously unreliable. For example, the fuel tanks of vehicles do not explode if they are shot. Nor do tires blow apart if shot with a pistol. But you frequently see this happen in films.
Morrell talks more about how research makes him ‘a fuller person’ and how he learned to fly in order to create an authentic pilot for his book The Shimmer. The expense of a pilot’s licence will probably be out of reach for the average self-publisher. YouTube could be the solution.

Use Wikipedia

Wikipedia is great for any sleuthing writer wanting to track down information about criminal procedure. Do, however, use the primary sources cited in the references to verify the information. In the online masterclass ‘How to Write a Crime Novel’ Dr Barbara Henderson recommends using at least two sources for internet-verification purposes.

Here are some searches to get you started:
  • Law enforcement in the United States
  • Police officer ranks (international)
  • Murder (crime definitions)
  • Firearms policy in the UK​

Security agencies

MI5 – the UK’s homeland security service
​Visit the official site of MI5. There’s information on how it handles covert surveillance, communications interception, and intelligence gathering, plus a brief overview of its history since its creation in 1909.

Christopher Andrew’s The Defence of the Realm is the first authorized history of the service. Published by Penguin in 2010, it’s available on Amazon and in major bookstores.

Visit The National Archives and type MI5 into the search box. That will give you access to all the files that have been released into the public domain to date.

National Crime Agency (UK)
The NCA is tasked with protecting UK citizens from organized crime. Its website has articles and reports about cybercrime, money laundering, drugs and firearms seizure, bribery and corruption, and trafficking.

I recommend looking at the NCA’s free in-depth but readable reports such as the National Strategic Assessment of Serious and Organised Crime 2018, which outlines threats, vulnerabilities, the impact of technology, and response strategies.

MI6 (SIS) – the UK’s secret intelligence service
​Visit the official website of the SIS to find out how it handles overseas intelligence gathering and covert operations. There’s a brief overview of the service’s history and some vignettes that illustrate how intelligence officers operate.

Keith Jeffery’s MI6: The History of the Secret Intelligence Service 1909–1949 is ‘the first – and only – history of the Secret Intelligence Service, written with full and unrestricted access to the closed archives of the Service for the period 1909–1949’. If you want historical information, this is a good place to start.
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GCHQ – Government Communications Headquarters (UK)
The GCHQ website is worth visiting just to see the building from which it operates in Cheltenham! There’s an overview of GCHQ history, operations, its various operational bases, and how it works with Britain’s other security services to manage global threats.

For a more in-depth study of the service, start with Richard Aldrich’s GCHQ: The Uncensored Story of Britain's Most Secret Intelligence Agency.

FBI – Federal Bureau of Investigation (USA)
The FBI’s website is packed with the usual overview material of how and why, but I think the go-to resources are the likes of the free Handbook of Forensic Services, the Terrorist Explosive Device Analytical Center (TEDAC) page, and the training guidance.

​The easiest way to navigate around the site is to head to the FBI home page and scroll down to the links in the footer.
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NSA – National Security Agency
The NSA website is the place to go for twenty-first-century code-breaking information, and there’s a ton of information about cybersecurity and intelligence. Head for the Publications section to get free access to The Next Wave and various research papers. The material is dense but could be just the ticket for building backstories for cybergeek characters.

Police forces

Michael O'Byrne is a former police officer who worked in Hong Kong, and later with the Metropolitan Police (sometimes referred to as New Scotland Yard). Try the second edition of his Crime Writer's Guide to Police Practice and Procedure.

INTERPOL
This is the world’s largest police force with nearly 200 member countries. The Expertise section of its website is rammed with useful and readable information on procedure, technical tools, investigative skills, officer training, fugitive investigations, border management and more.

UK police forces
Police procedure will vary depending on where you live. You can access a list of all UK police force websites here: Police forces, including the British Transport Police, the Central Motorway Policing Group, the Civil Nuclear Constabulary, the Ministry of Defence Police and the Port of Dover Police

An Garda Síochána – Ireland’s national police and security service
The easiest way to navigate the Garda’s website is to head for the home page and scroll down to the sitemap at the bottom. There you’ll find links to information on policing principles, organizational structure, and the history of the service. The Crime section is particularly strong on terminology and procedure.

Legal resources

Lawtons Solicitors’ website has an excellent Knowledge Centre filled with articles on parliamentary acts, offences, criminal charges and police procedure. What are the drug classifications in the UK? and Police Station interviews are just two examples.

Ann Rule’s advice on attending trials is aimed at true-crime writers, but you could use the guidance for fictional inspiration: Breaking Into True Crime: Ann Rule’s 9 Tips for Studying Courtroom Trials.

Crown Prosecution Service (UK): The Crown Prosecution Service (CPS) website provides detailed prosecution guidance for criminal justice professionals. It is extremely dense, and so it should be; it wasn’t designed for novelists! See, for example, the section on Core Foundation Principles for Forensic Science Providers: DNA-17 Profiling. Still, there’s a wealth of information there for those prepared to wade through it.

​Department of Justice (USA): The DOJ site offers guidance on the role of the Attorney General, the organizational structure of the department, lots of statistical information, and maps of federal facilities.

​Forensics resources

  • Forensic Science and Beyond: Authenticity, Provenance and Assurance is a free, huge and fascinating study that includes evidence and case studies of forensic science in relation to cybercrime, chemical weapons, victim identification, pharmaceuticals, nuclear forensics, and more. It’s worth a read for plot ideas as much as procedure.
  • The Crime Scene Investigator Network claims to be ‘the world’s most popular crime scene investigation and forensic science website’. It’s US-centric, so whether the procedures outlined there will be relevant to your jurisdiction will be worth checking.
    Still, the site is easy to navigate and avoids academic jargon. There’s information on evidence collection (blood, semen, firearms residue, drugs, fingerprints, fibres, and so on), photography and procedure, and a collection of articles written by crime scene investigators. Well worth visiting, wherever you’re based.
  • If you want to know what the UK’s Forensic Science Regulator considers best practice, delve into its current Codes of Practice And Conduct, 2017 and The Control and Avoidance of Contamination in Crime Scene Examination involving DNA Evidence Recovery.
  • For additional technical guidance, and to search for more forensics resources, visit the UK government’s Publications and search by keyword. What’s especially useful about these collections is that archived reports are held on file. And that means you can access guidance not only as it stands now, but in the past too.
  • The Royal Anthropological Institute has a Code of Practice for Forensic Anthropology that ‘defines the purpose of the forensic anthropology process and the series of steps that must be followed from the time a forensic anthropologist (FA) is notified of involvement in a case until the presentation of findings, whether by report alone or through the provision of evidence in the court room’.​
  • There are some interesting insights into human taphonomic research (that's body farms to you and me) in this report: The Operation of Body Farms – Learning Points for Setting up a Human Taphonomy Facility in the UK.
  • Val McDermid's Forensics: The Anatomy of Crime, published by the Wellcome Collection in 2015, 'traces the history of forensics from its earliest beginnings to the cutting-edge science of the modern day'.
  • Introduction to Forensic Science: This is a free online course from the University of Strathclyde via FutureLearn. 'Explore the methods underpinning forensic science, from crime scene investigation to reporting evidential value within a case.'

Historical crime writing resources

  • Victorian Crime & Punishment includes a prisoner database and case studies of real crimes and trials.
  • The National Archives holds historical records of serving officers in the Metropolitan Police and the Royal Irish Constabulary.​
  • The Police History Society documents police museums, collections, historical societies and related resources.
  • US crime writer Jason Lucky Morrow hosts a true-crime blog called Historical Crime Detective. The subtitle is ‘Where Old Crime Does New Time’. That in itself was enough to pull me in! He promises we ‘will discover forgotten crimes and forgotten criminals lost to history. You will not find high profile cases that have been rehashed and retold ad infinitum to ad nauseam.’

Weapons research

  • Harvard Injury Control Research Center's web pages related to firearms research offers a wealth of information on gun-related, accidents, ownership, carrying, and bad science.
  • Guns Guns Guns is an ‘online directory and forum for those who prize their right to keep and bear arms’. If you want to know something about firearms, the answer’s probably there.
  • The Firearms section of the UK government’s website includes statistics on firearms certification and guidance on legal use.
  • The ATF: Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives (USA) includes a photo gallery of different categories of guns, a code of federal regulations, licensing information in regard to firearms and explosives, and articles about tools and services for law enforcement.

Summing up

I hope you find these resources useful. I’ve barely been able to scratch the surface, not least because I’m busy trying to book a ride-along with my local bobby! While I sort that out, here’s some wise advice from David Morrell:
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The point isn’t to overload your book with tedious facts. Rather, your objective is to avoid mistakes that distract readers from your story. If you’ve done your research, readers will sense the truth of your story’s background. In addition, the topic should interest you so much that the research is a joy, not a burden.

About Louise Harnby

Louise Harnby is a line editor, copyeditor and proofreader who specializes in working with crime, mystery, suspense and thriller writers.

She is an Advanced Professional Member of the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CIEP) and co-hosts The Editing Podcast.

  • Get in touch: Louise Harnby | Crime Fiction & Thriller Editor
  • Connect: X @LouiseHarnby, Facebook and LinkedIn
  • Learn: Books and courses
  • Discover: Resources for authors and editors

11 Comments

Writing a crime novel – should you plan or go with the flow?

22/7/2018

1 Comment

 
Some crime writers are planners. Some are pantsers (so called because they fly by the seat of their pants). Neither is better than the other. What matters is that the method you choose to write your story works for you and results in a tale well told.
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Being either a planner or a pantser won’t determine whether you sell lots of books. A story that makes sense – one that reads as if you had carefully planned it – is what’s key to creating an experience that readers will relish.

So what do some of the big-name crime writers have to say on the matter?

What’s right for you?

‘The more I talk to other crime writers the more I start to become fairly sure that for each writer there is an ideal way, but there isn’t one ideal way,’ says Sophie Hannah.

I think I’ve read everything Harlan Coben’s ever written. If I haven’t, it’s waiting in the pile or on the Kindle. If you’d asked me, I’d have marked him as a planner. His stories hang together so well; he ties up every loose end. And I always have that ‘Ah, that’s what happened’ moment. But in fact, Coben’s a pantser:
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I don’t outline. I usually know the ending before I start. I know very little about what happens in between. It’s like driving from New Jersey to California. I may go Route 80, I may go via the Straits of Magellan or stopover in Tokyo … but I’ll end up in California.
​Maybe you’re like him or Julia Heaberlin:
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I start with just a fragment of a thought in my head. I don’t outline at all. I have no idea where the book is going.
​Or perhaps you’re like Susan Spann:
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My novels start with an outline, and that outline starts with the murder – even when the killing happens before the start of the book.
Or Hannah:
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When I start writing chapter 1, I have a 90–100-page plan … kind of like a list of ingredients of what needs to happen in each chapter. And I don’t write it well. I don’t write it elegantly. It could be written by a robot […] but everything necessary for that chapter, whether it’s a murder or a snide glance, is included in that plan.

What to consider

​To help you decide whether to plan or pants, consider the following:
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  • Will planning impede your creativity?
  • How fast do you write?
  • When do you want to find out whether your plot works?
  • Are you a linear or a non-linear writer?
  • How will you decide where to plant your clues?
  • How will you ensure your story has a cohesive structure?’

Will planning thwart your creativity?

Some writers fear that planning will mute their creativity and the process of discovery. The following excerpt is from an article from the NY Book Editors blog:
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For writers striving to create something unique and surprising, the kind of work that will grab the attention of agents and editors, the thorough plotting and planning can be a matter of life and death.

​By that, I mean that planning your novel ahead of time increases its likelihood of being dead on arrival. […] When writers engage in extensive pre-writing in the form of outlines and character sketches, we change the job of the writing we’re preparing to do. All of a sudden our role becomes that of the translator.
Heaberlin feels that surrendering control to her characters is essential to the creative unfolding of her stories:
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I let the characters kind of take me wherever they want me to go. It sounds a little precious but that’s what happens. The plot evolves through the characters telling me what’s going to happen next.
However, passionate planners feel differently. Their plans are as much a form of artistry as the actual writing. Here’s Hannah on how a plan needn’t thwart spontaneity:
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Plot and character are not rivals – they’re co-conspirators […] The biggest lie uttered by writers about planning is that it somehow limits or stifles creativity.

This is absolutely untrue. Planners simply divide their writing process into two equally important and creative stages: story architecture, and actual writing.

​Both are fun. And yes, of course you can make as many changes as you want when you come to write the book – I’ve changed characters, endings, plot strands, everything very spontaneously, even with my plan at my side, when it’s felt like the right thing to do.

Will planning speed up the writing process?

Some authors write multiple drafts to ensure the book’s plot works. That slows down the process. Hannah’s detailed planning approach means her first draft works; she’s already identified where the problems are before she gets started on the actual writing process.
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A lot of the thriller-writers I know who turn up their noses at planning end up writing four or five drafts of their novel before they’re happy with it. You might want to do that – in which case, you should do it! – but if you’d like to spend one year writing a book rather than five, planning is the way forward.
​Jeffery ​Deaver concurs:
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I plan everything out ahead of time. I work very hard to do that. Part of that is planning each subplot – I call it choreographing the plots.

I start with a post-it note. I put it in the upper left-hand corner [of my whiteboard] and that’s my opening scene. And then I start to fill in post-it notes throughout the whiteboard.

​Then I come up with a big idea for the twist, and that goes in the lower right-hand corner. And if that’s going to be a legitimate twist, that means planting clues.
He then walks around talking to himself, deciding where on the whiteboard the clues need to go so that the main plot and various subplots will work. And if he finds that a clue won’t work in a particular place because, say, character X doesn’t know Y yet, he moves the post-it note. It’s an eight-month process but once it’s done, ‘writing comes quickly’.
​
Still, don’t get too comfy! Andy Martin spent the best part of 12 months in the company of Lee Child as he wrote Make Me:
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Even before he had written the first sentence, he turned to me and said: “This is not the first draft, you know.” “Oh – what is it then?” I asked naively. “It’s the ONLY DRAFT!” he replied.
Which just goes to show that being a pantser doesn’t necessarily mean being a slow writer.

Surmounting obstacles​

If you’re a pantser, the idea of finding yourself stuck in a hole after months of writing might not terrify you. Lee Child certainly doesn’t let it stop him.

Says Henry Sutton, 
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When, for instance, [Child] hits a cul-de-sac, say his character – Reacher – might be at the point of an impossible situation to get out of, rather than go back and think, “Right, I’ve written too far. I need to delete that chapter or even the chapter before that”, he will think of a way of him actually surmounting that obstacle and then push him on.
In an interview with Harry Brett, Heaberlin acknowledges the need for third-party assistance to fill in the gaps and polish her stories:
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In Black-Eyed Susans I did know I wanted to write about mitochondrial DNA but it wasn’t actually until two thirds of the way through that book that I knew I wanted to write about the death penalty! […]

​At the end, my book is not perfect, not well-crafted. Mine have all these loose ends and so I work with an editor to kind of tidy up. But I also don’t like everything to be answered always, kind of like in real life.
Contrast that approach with those of these two planners:
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Deaver: I know what I’m going to write. In the case of The Cutting Edge, … I knew where all of the subplots went, I knew where the clues were introduced, I knew where the characters entered the book and when they left. […]

​When I do the outline, I can see whether the book is going to work or not. And if it isn’t going to work then I can just line up the post-it notes and start over [whereas] it can be a very difficult process to start writing and come to page 200 and not know where that book’s going to go.
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Hannah: 
Without a start-to-finish plan of what’s going to happen in my novel, I don’t know for certain that the idea is viable. It’s by writing a chapter-by-chapter, scene-by-scene synopsis that I put this to the test. I’d hate to invest years or even months in an idea I suspected was great, and then get to where the denouement should be and find myself thinking, “Yikes! I can’t think of a decent ending!"

What kind of writer are you?

In an interview with Henry Sutton in May 2018, Deaver discussed how planning can help the non-linear writer:
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Writing for me can be very difficult at times. And I have found that doing the outline allows me, since I know the entire schematic of the book, to write the beginning at the end, or the end at the beginning […]

​So I go to the outline and think: Today I’m supposed to be writing a vicious murder scene but the sun’s out, the birds are singing, and I don’t feel like it. I save it for those days when the cable guy who’s supposed to be coming at 8 in the morning doesn’t show up until 4 and I’m in a bad mood! I can jump around a bit.
So Deaver’s method allows him to concentrate on telling the part of the story he wants to tell when he wants to tell it.

For every writer who frets at the thought of not knowing where they’re going, there’s another for whom that’s a thrill. Child is a linear writer, and Zachary Petit thinks that ‘very well may be the key to his sharp, bestselling prose’.
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When he’s crafting his books, Child doesn’t know the answer to his question, and he writes scene by scene – he’s just trying to answer the question as he goes through, and he keeps throwing different complications in that he’ll figure out later.
If you too enjoy sharing the rollercoaster ride with your protagonist, pantsing could be the best way for you to tell your story. If not, detailed planning might suit you better.

How will you plant your clues?

Spann has a two-handed strategy for planning. And it’s all to do with the clues.
The first outline – the one that will determine what she writes – needn’t be particularly detailed. It’s a map of each scene, and each clue, that enables her to keep her sleuth on track.
​
Just as important, however, is the other outline:
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A secret outline, for your eyes alone. This one tracks the offstage action – what those lying suspects were really doing, and when, and why. The “secret outline” lets you know which clues to plant, and where, and keeps the lies from jamming up the story’s moving parts.
​I like her on- and offstage approach, and I think it’s particularly worth bearing in mind if you’re a self-publisher who’s not going to be commissioning developmental or structural editing.

What you don’t want is to go straight to working with a line or copyeditor and have them tell you your clues don’t make sense, because you’d be paying them to paint your walls even though there are still large cracks in the plasterwork.
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That offstage outline could help you to complete the build before you start tidying up.

The importance of structure

One thing’s for sure: whether you choose to plan or pants your way through the process, put structure front and centre. Recall my comment above about how Coben always leaves me feeling like he must have had everything worked out from the outset. That’s because however he gets from A to B, he understands structure.

Pantsing isn’t about ignoring structure, but about shifting the order of play. Says Deaver:
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[Lee Child and I] both structure our books. I just do it first. I run into those same roadblocks. And maybe for me it’s a little post-it note […] But the work has to be done somewhere. Any book should be about structure as much as fine stylistic prose.
And here’s domestic noir author Julia Crouch to wrap things up for us:
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There is a reason that screenwriting gurus bang on about the three-act structure – setup, confrontation and resolution – and that’s because it works. If you have any storytelling bones in you at all, you will more than likely, even subconsciously, end up with a structure like this.

​But it’s helpful to bear it in mind and, whether you structure beforehand (as a plotter), or after (as a pantser), run your plot through that mill.
Good luck with your planning or pantsing!

Further reading

  • Andy Martin. The man with no plot: How I watched Lee Child write a Jack Reacher novel. The Conversation. 2015.
  • Harlan Coben. FAQ.
  • How to write crime – Harry Brett in conversation with Sophie Hannah and Julia Heaberlin. Waterstones, Norwich. 2018.
  • Jeffery Deaver – The cutting edge. Henry Sutton in conversation with Jeffery Deaver. National Centre for Writing. 2018.
  • Julia Crouch. Five tips for keeping your readers gripped. Noirwich. 2018.
  • NY Book Editors. Planning to outline your novel? Don’t.
  • Sophie Hannah. Why and how I plan my novels. 2018.
  • Susan Spann. 25 things you need to know about writing mysteries. TerribleMinds: Chuck Wendig. 2013.
  • The different levels of editing: Proofreading and beyond. Louise Harnby. The Parlour, 2011.
  • Zachary Petit. Lee Child debunks the biggest writing myths. 2012.

About Louise Harnby

Louise Harnby is a line editor, copyeditor and proofreader who specializes in working with crime, mystery, suspense and thriller writers.

She is an Advanced Professional Member of the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CIEP) and co-hosts The Editing Podcast.

  • Get in touch: Louise Harnby | Crime Fiction & Thriller Editor
  • Connect: X @LouiseHarnby, Facebook and LinkedIn
  • Learn: Books and courses
  • Discover: Resources for authors and editors

1 Comment

Crime fiction subgenres: Where does your novel fit?

9/4/2018

9 Comments

 
Crime fiction falls into a range of subgenres. Knowing where your novel fits helps you understand what readers expect, which published writers you can learn from, and how you might stand out.
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Setting the scene

This article provides an overview of some of the established subgenres, though the list isn’t exhaustive.

There’s crossover certainly and, depending on the commentator, crime fiction gets chopped up into subgenres variously.

I’ve elected not to focus on inverted-detective fiction, heists and capers, LGBTQ mysteries, feminist crime fiction, or romantic suspense, but these subgenres and more all have their place in the market.

One thing’s for sure: ‘Crime fiction is never static and never appears to be running out of ideas,’ says Barbara Henderson.

Two good reasons to know your subgenre

If you’re going it alone, one of your publishing jobs will be to help your readers find your book. When you upload to Amazon, Smashwords or any other distribution platform, you’ll need to decide which BISAC headings to place your book under.

And if you’re going down the traditional publishing route, identifying your subgenre(s) will help a literary agent understand which publishers have a best-fit list and where in a bookstore your novel will be shelved.

If the fit isn’t obvious to you, it could be harder to convince your agent that your book’s marketable.

Ultimately, though, it's the writing that needs to be top-notch, not strict conformity to one or another subgenre. These days, it's probably harder to find crime fiction that isn't fusion of subgenres!

​Cosy crime fiction

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If much of today’s crime fiction seems gritty, even gratuitously violent, and that’s not the way you want to write, fret not. Cosy crime is alive and kicking (though gently).
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Publishers are rushing to bring “lost” golden-age authors such as Annie Haynes back into print, and to repackage the likes of Margery Allingham and Francis Durbridge. (Alison Flood)
What distinguishes the cosy? Murder yes, but leave out the gore, the pain, and depressing social commentary. Your protagonist might well be flawed but no more so than anyone else in the novel, and your readers will embrace your hero’s quirkiness with a skip in their step.

That doesn’t mean the cosy isn’t tight on plot and well-paced action that drive the novel forward. Contemporary readers want fantastic mysteries with twists and turns that will keep them guessing.

Cosies can be liberating for the playful crime writer who wants to explore the genre with non-traditional characters placed in non-traditional settings: 
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  • ​Agatha Raisin is a former PR agent who moves to a village in the Cotswolds.
  • Amy Myers’ Auguste Didier Mysteries feature a Victorian master chef cum sleuth.
  • Lilian Jackson Braun’s The Cat Who … Mysteries feature Jim Qwilleran and his sleuthing cat Koko.
  • Nancy J. Cohen’s Bad Hair Day Mysteries feature a beauty-salon owner.

​Classic detective – the Golden Age and beyond

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RD Collins locates the start of the genre with Poe’s The Murders in the Rue Morgue. It found its feet with Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes and entered into a Golden Age in the 1920s with Agatha Christie’s Hercule Poirot and Dorothy L Sayers’ Lord Peter Wimsey, among others.
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The Golden Age introduced ‘rules’ for the genre. Reba White Williams summarizes these as follows:
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  1. All the clues available to the investigator must be available to the reader.
  2. There must be a body and we must be introduced to it quickly.
  3. The perpetrator can’t conveniently appear out of nowhere in the finale.
  4. The crime must be solved by deduction rather than coincidence.
  5. There must be multiple clues that can be interpreted in a variety of ways, and more than one suspect.
  6. Details must be accurate.

See also the quote further down from Otto Penzler about locked-room mysteries – no cheating with doubles and magic!

​Today’s authors must abide by the same rules, no matter whether their tales are set in Oxford with Morse, LA with Bosch, or Reykjavik with Erlendur.

Hardboiled crime fiction

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Los Angeles had never been written about. California had been written about, a book called Ramona ... a lot of sentimental slop. But nobody in my time had tried to write about a Los Angeles background in any sort of realistic way.
That’s a quote from Raymond Chandler in conversation with Ian Fleming in 1958. Chandler’s response was to write crime fiction that was gritty, depressing, violent, cynical and seedy.
​
Hardboiled crime writing, as it came to be known, pulls no punches. The protagonists aren’t invulnerable superheroes. And the environments within which they operate are those of contrast – urban decay and tourist hotspots, hope and corruption.

If your crime writing falls into this category, don’t set an amateur protagonist sleuth alongside foolish law-enforcement officers who have neither brains nor access to detection resources.

Hardboiled isn’t pretty but it’s rich in believability. Plots are fattened with complex characters, social commentary and, of course, murder.

Says Matthew Lewin on the contemporary hardboiled crime fiction of James Lee Burke and James Ellroy:
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There is a fury and desperation in this new writing that touches on the violence and depravity of our time as well as the grace and beauty of the best in human nature and the physical world.
​Think Harry Bosch. Tim Walker refers to his creator Michael Connelly as ‘the modern Raymond Chandler’. ‘Connelly says he still sees it as a duty to acknowledge the social climate in his novels’.

​Think also Rebus; Ian Rankin, like Connelly, fuses hardboiled with police procedural masterfully. 

With hardboiled, even when the crime is solved, your readers won’t expect to close the book feeling that everyone will live happily ever after.

​​Historical crime fiction

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Popular series feature CJ Sansom’s Shardlake, SJ Parris’s Giordano Bruno, Susanna Gregory’s Thomas Chaloner, and Ellis Peters’ Brother Cadfael.

The genre is as interesting for its criminal investigations as for the lessons in social history afforded to the reader. And because the reader needs to understand the historical setting, these novels are often long.

Sansom’s Dark Fire comes in at a whopping 600-plus pages. I have the hardback version and I’m sure I bulked up my biceps just carrying the book from Waterstones to the car park.

If historical fiction floats your writing boat, be prepared to put in the research. Many of your readers will know their history so you’ll need to dig deep.

It’s no accident that the protagonists in these novels are curious renegade monks, lawyers, scholars and the like. The criminal justice system as it exists in our era bears little resemblance to that in these bygone days. Consider the following:
​
  • How did the law work in your time period and location?
  • Where did power reside? With the church, the monarchy, the government, or the military?
  • What obstacles would your protagonist have been up against? Think gender, access to education, and class boundaries for starters.
  • Would your antagonist have had an easier ride than a contemporary baddie? Think modern forensics, technology, transport, communications and socio-economic factors.

Some historical fiction is cosier and shorter. Consider David Dickinson’s Lord Powerscourt and Emily Brightwell’s Mrs Jeffries. These Victorian mysteries offer plenty of intrigue and good old-fashioned murder, but we’re spared the grisly details.

Don’t be surprised to see this lighter crime fiction splashed with a dose of humour as the authors cast their gaze over the social-economic and gender disparities typical of the era.

​Still, if the Regency or Victorian cosy is your bag, you’ll still need to gen up on period details.

​Legal and medical crime fiction

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Courtrooms, labs and hospitals make for great crime fiction, and ‘lawyers and doctors make effective protagonists since they seem to exist on a plane far above the rest of us. Although popular, these tales are usually penned by actual lawyers and doctors due to the demands of the information presented,’ writes Stephen D. Rogers.

Here are some examples:
  • John Grisham (A Time to Kill, The Runaway Jury) is a former criminal lawyer.
  • Kathy Reichs (Déjà Dead, Bare Bones) is certified by the American Board of Forensic Anthropology.
  • Robin Cook (Coma, Godplayer) is a trained medical doctor.

That old trope of writing what you know comes into play here and it’s a good reminder that using your own specialist knowledge to bring authenticity to your crime writing makes good sense. And if you’re not a former cop, doc or lawyer but you have friends who are, be sure to pick their brains.

In particular, research the role of your legal or medical protagonist and ensure that the powers of investigation you assign to them are appropriate for their location.

​Even if you’re pushing the boundaries of existing science, to give your reader the best experience the foundations will need to be solid.

Locked-room crime fiction​

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The crime scene is that of a moving train, a secluded and heavily guarded house, an aeroplane, a single-track road with only one way in and one way out ... less whodunnit, more howdunnit.
​
A locked-room novelist is the illusionist of crime writing, the creator of ‘impossible’ fiction. And yet not so impossible as it turns out, as our brilliant protagonist gradually reveals all.

Take care though. No cheating is allowed with locked-room crime. Says Otto Penzler:
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The solutions to none of these locked room murders and thefts have supernatural elements and there is no cheating about ​hidden panels, long-lost twins, waking from dreams or hallucinations. No, they are deduced by detectives, who explain all to the incredulous characters and the baffled reader.
Well-known examples include:
  • And Then There Were None: Agatha Christie
  • The Hollow Man: John Dickson Carr
  • The Murders in the Rue Morgue: Edgar Allan Poe

​The artistry of the locked-room mystery lies in the author’s ability to deliver a reveal that doesn’t rely on a device that doesn’t exist in real life, that doesn’t require information to be deliberately withheld from the reader, and isn’t so obvious as to be deducible at the beginning of the story.

I recommend The Locked-room Mysteries, Penzler’s superb anthology for aspiring locked-room crime writers who want to see masters at work. It's huge – over 930 pages – ​and heavy, but literally worth its weight.

​Police procedural

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If you’re writing a police procedural, your in-depth research will need to be top-notch. The angle you take will be determined by your protagonist’s skills. Examples include:
​
  • Harry Bosch: detective (Michael Connelly)
  • Jenny Cooper: coroner (MR Hall)
  • John Rebus: detective (Ian Rankin)
  • Kay Scarpetta: medical examiner (Patricia Cornwell)
  • Kurt Wallander: detective (Henning Mankell)
  • Lincoln Rhyme: forensic consultant (Jeffery Deaver)
  • Temperance Brennan: forensic anthropologist (Kathy Reichs)

Procedurals are notable for their thoroughly researched and authentic rendering of detection, evidence-gathering, forensics, autopsies, and interrogation procedures in order to solve the novel’s crime(s).

Wowser tools and tech don’t come at the cost of strong characterization though. Rhyme is paralyzed following an on-scene accident. Cooper is recovering from the breakdown of her marriage. Rebus has a history of trauma dating from his former military career. Wallander has diabetes, and his daughter attempted suicide in her teenage years.

These in-depth backstories provide complexity and conflict – a kind of layering that fattens the plot without complicating it.

I find Cooper a little whiny, Rebus grumpy, Scarpetta arrogant, Wallander depressing. That doesn’t stop me falling in love with them though. In fact, flawed characters can balance the sterility of the procedural details.
​
And you, the writer, might find a protagonist with foibles more enjoyable to write. Mankell did:
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It’s quite true that I don’t particularly like [Wallander]. But then I think most writers would say it’s more interesting to write about a person you don’t like. I’m quite sure Shakespeare enjoyed writing Iago much more than he did writing Othello. [...] It’s much better to have something between you and your main character that grates.

​Spy thriller

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When it comes to spy stories, your protagonist is a spook, the nation’s safety the hook. It’s a race against time – against a larger-than-life antagonist – in order to save, well, everyone. The plots are usually complex and the action high-octane.
​
‘When you’re writing spy fiction you have one overriding goal: to keep the reader turning the pages,’ says Graeme Shimmin.
​
Here’s some great advice from Kathrine Roid: Don’t wing it when it comes to plot:
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​A spy novel needs to be thought out beforehand, even more so than novels of most genres. Unlike, say, a quest fantasy, where plot points can be shuffled or cut out or added without too much trouble, everything needs to be compactly connected to the main plot. (Unplotted) whims simply do not have a place.
If you’re wandering into spy-fi territory, you’ll have a little more freedom to play with gadgetry. If you’re keeping it real, do the research. Know your guns and your gear so that your protagonist doesn’t end up more tactifool than tactical.

But old on a mo. Your spy crime fiction doesn’t have to be a sprint like Robert Ludlum’s or Clive Cussler’s. Mick Herron is one of my favourite writers. The pace might be a little gentler but the brooding narrative is utterly believable. His Jackson Lamb series features the ‘slow horses’ – MI5 agents who’ve messed up and been put out to graze in the backwoods of inactive service.

Herron’s crime isn’t spy-fi – there are no wacky gadgets to get Lamb’s crew out of a fix. The characters are vulnerable, disgruntled, and bored ... until there’s a crime and Lamb suspects the spooks. It’s a fine example of character-driven writing with attention to detail on Service procedural and detection legwork.

​Private eye and amateur sleuth

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The private-eye tradition crosses subgenres: from cosy to hardboiled to classic thriller.
​
  • For cosies, consider MC Beaton’s Agatha Raisin mysteries and Agatha Christie’s Miss Marple. Here, the amateur sleuth is surrounded by far less knowledgeable and somewhat hapless police officers.
  • For hardboiled, think Chandler’s Philip Marlowe and Tim Weaver’s David Raker. Raker is a former journalist who, following the death of his wife, turns to investigating missing persons.
  • Sara Paretsky and Sue Grafton offer two examples of gritty female PI protagonists in the form of V.I. Warshawski and Kinsey Millhone.
  • One of my favourites is ‘accidental detective’ Myron Bolitar, a slightly softer-boiled sports agent with excellent martial arts skills and a compelling backup team.
  • And let us not forget Precious Ramotswe, Alexander McCall Smith’s delicious founder of the No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency. McCall Smith manages to keep things light without getting too cosy, and captivate without shocking. It’s gentle, penetrating crime fiction.

Telling your story through a point-of-view character who works outside law enforcement has its advantages: your protagonist can behave and move in ways that a detective can’t, at least not without risking their job.

On the other hand, your sleuth won’t have access to the wealth of contemporary resources available to the police.
​
And take care not to make your amateur’s successes depend on witless professionals. Certainly, every organization/service has its fools and bad apples, and crime fiction is the perfect tool with which to explore police and state corruption, but contemporary readers are unlikely to engage with a novel whose chief investigator is an oaf.

​Transgressor/noir

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If this is your bag, you’ll go where others fear to tread. Whodunnit is still in the mix, but whydunnit is close behind.

It shares the grit of hardboiled but is distinctive for its focus on the narratives of the transgressor (Eoin McNamee: Resurrection Man), the victim (Larsson: The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo), or both (Lippman: I’d Know You Anywhere).

The authors who do this subgenre best seem almost to be able to channel their characters’ psychosocial conflict, and dig deep into the predator–prey relationship.

And even when the detective is the protagonist, they’re less superhero than anti-hero, troubled by demons, working despite – rather than within – an establishment as troubled as them (James Ellroy: LA Confidential; Antonin Varenne: Bed of Nails).

​Says Penzler in ‘Noir fiction is about losers, not private eyes’:
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​There are no heroic figures in noir fiction. [...] The noir story with a happy ending has never been written, nor can it be. The lost and corrupt souls who populate these tales were doomed before we met them because of their hollow hearts and depraved sensibilities.
​Regional variants – e.g. Tartan, Scandinavian, Emerald – that represent the landscape, culture, idiom, and social and political identity of their settings have emerged to international acclaim.

​A quick note on subgenre fusion

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Your book might well fall into what Agnieszka Sienkiewicz-Charlish calls genre syncretism: ‘the hard-boiled detective story, the police procedural, Gothic fiction and the psycho-social novel’. She offers Rankin’s Rebus novels as an example.

Consider also China Miéville's The City & The City. In this novel, two locations occupy the same physical space. At heart, it's a police procedural, but there's a speculative/fantasy take on the hardboiled tradition: the shiny surfaces of one city butt up against a grubbier alternate, yet residents of each are legally bound to 'unsee' each other. As such, Mieville incorporates a subtle commentary on state authoritarianism, surveillance and corruption into a murder investigation.

Genre syncretism can help your work stand out, but take care to recognize the conventions of each so that the core subgenre elements are all done well. No reader will thank you for promising a fusion of hardboiled and police procedural if both are half-baked. Good writing trumps everything.

I hope you find this useful and wish you sleuthing success on your crime-writing journey!

And there's that video I promised for those of you who'd prefer to watch or listen.

More resources

  • Start Crime Fiction Editing (self-paced course)
  • ‘From cozy to caper: A guide to mystery genres’: Stephen D. Rogers, Writing World, 2002
  • ‘Henning Mankell: I'm not afraid of dying’: Interview with John Preston, The Telegraph, 2011
  • ‘How to write a crime novel’: Penguin Random House webinar with Dr Barbara Henderson, 2018
  • ‘How to write a spy novel’: Kathrine Roid, 2011
  • ‘In conversation: Ian Fleming and Raymond Chandler’: Transcript published in Five Dials, 1958
  • ‘Michael Connelly interview: The modern Raymond Chandler on Bosch, The Long Goodbye, and LA's neighbourhoods’: The Independent, 2016
  • ‘Modern hardboiled crime’: Matthew Lewin, The Guardian, 2009
  • ‘Murder most cosy: Why mystery novels involving quilts and cats are big business’: Alison Flood, The Guardian, 2015
  • ‘Noir fiction is about losers, not private eyes’: Otto Penzler, Huffington Post, 2010
  • ‘Tartan noir: Crime, Scotland and genre in Ian Rankin’s Rebus novels’: Agnieszka Sienkiewicz-Charlish
  • ​‘The best locked-room mysteries: when impossible crimes aren’t’: Otto Penzler, Huffington Post, 2014
  • ‘The Golden Age of detective fiction’: Reba White Williams
  • The Locked-room Mysteries: Otto Penzler, Corvus, 2014
  • ‘The origins of detective fiction’: RD Collins, Classic Crime Fiction, 2004
  • ‘Writing spy fiction with an unputdownable plot’: Graeme Shimmin​

​About Louise Harnby

Louise Harnby is a line editor, copyeditor and proofreader who specializes in working with crime, mystery, suspense and thriller writers.

She is an Advanced Professional Member of the Chartered Institute of Editing and Proofreading (CIEP) and co-hosts The Editing Podcast.

  • Get in touch: Louise Harnby | Crime Fiction & Thriller Editor
  • Connect: X @LouiseHarnby, Facebook and LinkedIn
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9 Comments

How to be a better writer: Using a growth mindset to hone your craft

6/11/2017

6 Comments

 
​Lisa Poisso explains how an editor or book coach can teach you new ideas and techniques, and help you begin the journey of mastering novel craft right from the get-go ... if you're prepared to embrace a growth mindset.
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When it’s time to reach for growth

I don’t know what I’m doing, and I’m not very good. Will you fix my book? If this sounds like the way you tiptoed into your first professional edit, you’re due for a new mindset. An edit is a creative opportunity begging to burst open and drench you with new ideas and techniques.

There’s no better time to reach for growth than when you’re first starting out. You’ll hear a lot of publishing types claim that debut authors need to put in their dues. Write, they tell you, and fail. Write more, and fail again. That’s the apprenticeship process – or so they say.
​
But it doesn’t have to be that way. Hiring an editor or writing coach can be a smart way to accelerate your learning curve. It’s all about the way you and your editor approach your edit. Are you feeding your writing with a fixed mindset or a growth mindset?

​​The growth mindset

If you’re a first-time author, your debut novel isn’t likely to hit it big. You know that. Editors know that. So you might tell yourself that there’s no sense in paying for a professional edit until readers start buying your books and ‘it really matters'.

The problem is this: if your book isn’t very good and nobody wants to buy it, when will it really matter?

Enter a new mindset about developing your craft.

The fixed mindset, a term developed by Stanford University professor Carol Dweck, keeps your feet stuck to the same two dusty patches of dirt you’ve been standing on for years. With a fixed mindset, you accept that you possess finite abilities capped at a specific level. Editing is about propping up your shortcomings and repairing your inevitable mistakes.

But editors can help you achieve so much more. Your editor can show you how to structure a compelling story, beef up the elements that drive your plot, solidify your language, and polish your writing voice. You’ll make strides it might have taken years to struggle through on your own.
​
But that won’t happen unless you decide that developing your craft is worth the time, money, and effort. It won’t happen until you agree that you’re ready to grow.

​Your first novel; your first edit

A first novel is a learning experience. Authors call them ‘practice novels’ or ‘trunk novels'. They write their hearts out and then lock the results deep inside a file cabinet or trunk. The results aren’t all that different from the canvases artists create to experiment with and practise new techniques. They’re not meant for public consumption.

Good on you for finishing your first manuscript. A complete novel is a tremendous achievement – but it’s unlikely that this first effort will become a bestseller. So start writing the next one.

If you really want to make a go of this writing thing, you’ll need more than one good idea in a lifetime, right? Whip up the next concept and get it simmering. Meanwhile, seek feedback on the first manuscript from a writing partner or critique group. Give yourself the space to learn as you go rather than pinning all your hopes and ambitions on a single beginner’s effort.
​
And then when you’ve finally written something your test readers and critique partners are giving you good feedback about, consider a professional edit.

​The learning curve

You could keep plugging away for years, feeding book after book to your writer’s trunk. You might gain some confidence and make some incremental progress. But without professional feedback, you might not be able to figure out which parts of your story work and which don’t. You might not be able to spot what passages show a distinctive authorial voice and what parts are still mushy.

At some point, it’s time for professional eyes. Send your manuscript to a few editors for a professional assessment. You’re not hiring anyone yet; you’re not paying for a critique or evaluation. All you want is that initial handshake. Every editor performs some sort of brief survey of new projects to help them decide if the project and type of work required falls within their wheelhouse.

Ask the editor to flip through, take a peek at a few spots, and see if your work is ready for editing. What strengths and weaknesses do they spot? What kind of editing do they recommend? Would they take you on as a client or do they have other recommendations?

If the results are encouraging, use the feedback you’ve gathered to help you choose a compatible editor. It’s time for some editing.

​A learning experience

Even a routine, production-oriented edit is a learning experience. But when you hire an editor who enjoys working with authors bent on growth and improvement, an edit becomes something else altogether: an intense, one-on-one workshop in storytelling and writing.
​
I like to compare your motivations for an edit to the motivations you create for the characters in your story. Your characters’ external, conscious motivations wrap around their secret, unconscious motivations – and the same goes for you.

​Polishing your manuscript for publication might be your conscious motivation, but with a growth mindset, you’ll come to realize that the real value of an edit lies in the substantial leaps you can make toward mastering your craft.
 
Professional editing is no guarantee that your novel will be publishable in the end. But if you’ve chosen a qualified professional, you can count on acquiring invaluable insights into your writing technique. You can count on a growth experience.

​​What’s your writing worth to you?

I’m constantly astounded by the number of new writers who don’t believe that writing is worth the level of commitment any serious hobbyist would give their hobby.

A recreational cyclist can easily drop thousands every year on bicycles, riding gear, event and travel fees, club and periodical subscriptions, and more. A collector of anything? The expenditures are obvious.

​
But when it comes to writing, people somehow feel guilty about spending money on classes or craft books or editing to help them develop their passion.

​Just think how conflicted they must feel if they’re also harbouring hopes of getting published. Somehow, they have to go from beginner to professional with no help – and at no cost.


Is a professional edit still worth it even if your book never gets any bites from an agent or sells more than 50 copies on Amazon? If using your manuscript to spring to a new level of skill ignites your creative jets, you’re ready to invest in yourself. You’re ready to turn a growth mindset into growth. It’s that simple.

See you on the other side of the edit.

About Lisa Poisso

With over thirty years as a writer and editor, Lisa Poisso has edited and coached developing journalists, content writers and bloggers. She's worked as a journalist, magazine editor, managing editor, corporate communications manager, content writer, foreign language and j-school tutor and communications consultant.

Now, she works exclusively with emerging authors and publishers of fiction, teaching theory and practice and helping writers discover strategies and technique that they can use for the rest of their writing career.

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